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Stupid Mistake

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Some time ago, (a couple years, although it seems to be there all the time) some guy basicly was trying to convince me to sleep with him I had kissed him, altough later realised he had a gf, so was like no! He then started guilt trips and anything that maybe able to get a girl to just do it. Things got bad and when i knocked him back he tried to get on top of me, pushed him off and that was fine for 10 mins, he said sorry, this happened a few times. Until he pinned me down, started taking my clothes off, I made the a threat that scared him off...... ( the thing is it kills me, i let it get that far, and what if i hadn't said exactly what i did)..... Ihave bumped into him recently and feel really angry....... at him ............. but alson for not doing more at the time.......... any thoughts?

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nothing much you can do I am afraid, but avoid him. He sounds like an asshole. Only thing I can think of is informing his girlfriend, but I'd be hesitant about it. Better not get involved.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Rather than punish yourself you should be proud that you DID put a stop to things, even if you think that you might have done it sooner. You have realised that you have a lot of strength in you when it comes down to it. We can all be coerced to do things we don't really want to be doing, it happens all the time both in our work and our social lives. We get put in places where we're not really comfortable for a variety of reasons. Don't beat yourself up. When the chips were down you found a way to regain control. That is not easy when you are so vulnerable.

    As for the guy, I agree that there is little you can do at this stage. Keeping clear of him would be best. One thing that generally holds true about people is that they make their own future with their attitude and outlook. Unless they change something fundamental then they will keep moving in the same circles. This guy will most likely reap the consequences of his behaviour sooner or later. Let's hope it's sooner, and that nobody else gets traumatised.

    Just try to focus on what you did right, not what you did wrong. Learn any lessons that you can from the incident, to turn negatives into positives, but forgive yourself and be proud of your strength.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Avoid him at all costs, he actually sounds rather dangerous to me. I hate guys that won't take no for an answer and know many people who have felt terribly threatened when someone who has been asked not to go any further actually rolls on top of them.

    You should feel like a strong young woman, who asserted herself and stopped a situation going further than you'd like. Look out for his type though, and avoid.
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