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Time for another ranty thread

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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Omg i so hate how psychiatric meds make my eye pupils massive. I look either very scared or im drugged up. My eyes are now looking more black then blue again lol
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Shaunie said:
    Omg i so hate how psychiatric meds make my eye pupils massive. I look either very scared or im drugged up. My eyes are now looking more black then blue again lol
    The amount of times I've been asked if I have any drugs cause of this is unreal 🙈😂 
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Hard to breath constantly is like being second nature (think the rigjt words) which maybe good cause maybe i focus on it less but i am still fed up. Cause it really hurts my shoulders cause like when deep breath, have to do it so over egarated that i have to push my arm down (like if you try to deep breath you may push your arms down) and yeah my shoulders really hurt and hurt my everytime i feel out of breath. 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    I really need it to stop. Please.
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    I'm an absolute twat
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    BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Meant to be going on a date tonight but really can't be bothered, but I know that's just depression talking, don't know what to do 😓 
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 2019
    Omg is it bad that im not That worried about teddy's heart results, im more annyoed about my family shouting about it all the time like he is dying of heart faulire, when its a heart murmur which can mean nothing, why thinking the worst before even knoW. Starting to stress me out now
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,788 Master Poster
    I think I might need a boat. Haha. The area is so flooded right now. Actually had to ring mum to collect me 30 minutes early because I am absolutely soaked and cold. 
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Why do my family never understand i do not want to speak to anyone after work. Just want to be by myself. Already have my own voices(my mind) to listen to. 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    I just want to be able to go for a walk without feeling so light-headed.. fuck sake
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Why do people think can throw away things that are not theirs😒😒😒
    and do you think if i drink pepis max through a straw, skipping my teeth. My teeth will never be ruined?
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 2019
    People are trying to  make me feel bad indirectly, from work. Im not fucking stupid & feel at some point i will react cause fed up of peoples shit. Just leave me alone. I dont think im paraniod
    Post edited by Siena on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 2019
    So theres people are my work and dunno why havw their numbers considering i dont reply but now trying to involve me in their drama. Like this guy indirectly tries to make me feel bad and has done ever since. When i dont give a shit about how i put stock out and doesnt even say it jokely like hes serious like omg its just primark. No ones gunna die if dont do it properly. Yet hes one who needs to be told how to fold properly & my manager says how well i do so i aint bothered. and now hes speaking about girl who reported him again (another worker). Just thinking Like what you was probably rude to her. Idek how hes still working tbh its not first complaint from a worker. Like not this Again lol  Cause we have new workers cause lot of people who work weekends are young and gone off to uni (feel like shit being stuck there) and so he clearly not making new people feel welcomes
    Post edited by Siena on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited October 2019
    Omg i cant take this shit life much longer 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭am safe
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Omg i feel so bad that soon will have to wake up and leave my bed. I dont want another dAy of this 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭i seeiously want to kill myself ( but im sAfe cause feel so low i have no energy to try). 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Some body help me 😭😭😭😭. I need it to stop😭😭😭😭. Honestly if i could fix this one thing in ny life right now maybe id have more hope but theres no hope now. Getting worse i swear & i cant do this anymore 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited October 2019
    No one can help me. I just keep picturing me killing myself and being dead and forgotten about and then i imagine my families life without me and they forget me and live life fine and its just like great shall i skip the suffering and just die, gunna die anyway. That makes sense since no way out from this. 
    I am actually safe. & this is not a crisis. This is just my life &how i feel all the time

    but you know when it hits you so bad and reallyyy hurts to be alive😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭hurts all the time but feel unbarable and im stuck here 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    This will probs be me one day


    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited October 2019
    just sent samaritans load of messages. Maybe it is abusing their service to be so dependant on them & feel bad

    ill stop spamming now
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Over slept. What a twat.
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited October 2019
    Trying to be positive doesnt change how shit your life is. My life is shit with these problems   Helps but yeah still same problems
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,788 Master Poster
    On my way back to hell in a few minutes. Wish me luck.

    Hell is school BTW.

    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    😭😭😭😭😭just want to be left alon
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Many, many attempts and 4 doctors later they finally got blood... from my pulse 🙃🙃 
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited October 2019
    Ffs. Been trying to take my flouxatine but keep gaging instead of swallowing it 😓 so ive given up for today. Good job is a capsule cause cant afford to waste meds lol, ew. Fml its horrible taking even one pill now. What past overdosing does to you 🤢. Makes my mouth water just looking at pills 🤢🤢🤢🤢 too much anxiety to swallow them. Ironic pill is for anixety and depression. 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
     Forgot to put the bins out yesterday 😭😭 gets collected every 2 weeks 😭😭😭
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    And I just walked straight into flood water and got stuck 😂 now I'm gonna be late and I can't be late 😭
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    DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,788 Master Poster
    Got detention after school and it isn't even my fault. 
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Wearing new shoes all day fucking sucks. My feet are so blistered
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    BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    When the doctor wastes half hour talking to you (I thought it was cause I was in tears) asking why you're so distressed and  saying you can go home and you get your hopes up then says 'but the police brought you back' mate that wasn't me that's the girl next door 🙈  😭😂 
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
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