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Advice wanted

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Please take a look at the link below and see what you think.

I've had enough of sending 'potential' women a message and not receiving any replies.
I'm BORED!!

plentyoffish

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I like the last bit about not knowing what to say, and that you don't bite. I think you need to write it out a bit more like you were having a conversation with someone rather than writing a list.
    Also- a pic of you smiling would be nice :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't know. I never saw a "usual" profile like that score. I think you need just to be a bit more edgy. You don't really sell a product by counting up it's good feats, you just talk about it like your like had no sense up to now and if you don't buy it your are a lost cause. This is not a CV, just put up a photo of your sixpack (if it exists) and be an asshole.

    there are thousand of profiles like yours. If you don't make the difference nobody will care.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It sounds like you're trying too hard tbh.
    I'm also going to read the Twilight novels when my sister has finished reading them
    Why include this sentence? Just be yourself!
    You have also put the words honest and trustworthy in bold, why? again - people will just assume that you are anyway, probably less likely to think that when you have to tell people that you are though.
    I'm working full time in a factory based in Skipton. I won't say which one as you will be wanting me to buy some for you lol.
    I'm not keen on this sentence either, it sounds like you're assuming whoever reads your profile will only be interested in material possesions.

    The whole thing just seems really CV-ish like strubbleS mentioned, just be light-hearted, nobody will care about the fact that your car has problems or that you intend to read books, you dont need to include it!

    I'm not saying change who you are, just be selective in the information you choose to give out. Give yourself some mystery!


    ETA: Just noticed at the bottom that you're pretty selective about who can contact you...surely that will be eliminating a lot of people, why not just let anyone contact you then you can decide from there to persue things or not, its better to get 50 replys that are useless than none at all, if anything they'd at least be an ego boost
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hmm... basically what others have said.

    I don't like the bit in bold - it might just be me - but it seem like your forcing that across.

    Saying you want someone good looking is like you only want something materialistic.

    There doesn't seem to be much personallity coming through. You dont need to put as much info about you car.

    The list at the bottom is very limiting to who can contact you, there isn't much point in being choosey at this stage.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi

    Hi mate,

    I don't want to sound rude or anything, but when I look at your picture, read your interests and then read the statement about yourself it all sounds a bit geeky to me.

    1) Try and go out to places and meet people that way, just general socialising, maybe ask some of your mates what they think and how they would describe yourself.

    2) Widen your interests, playing PS3 at 25 is not really appealling to a woman between 19-27. Things like restuarents, bars, clubs, travelling, show ambition and direction in your life, like where you see yourself in 5yrs time, etc etc.

    3) Structure what you say in your profile, Talk about yourself roughly for a couple of lines, Then talk about your interests and hobbies, then talk about the kind of person you are looking for.

    4) Maybe style your hair, create a new image.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd lose these two:

    Must not have messaged users looking for intimate encounters or sex.
    - makes it seem like you're scared of people who consider sex to be a healthy part of life.

    You must have a picture to contact this user.
    - makes it seem like you are really shallow - once someone gets to know you a bit
    they can send a picture

    And this "and is good-looking" is a completely stupid thing to say - anybody who is thinking of contacting you will feel you're going to make a snap decision on them based on appearance. Few people would want to expose themselves to that level of harsh and arbitrary judgement.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As others have said, you sound a bit "nerdy". Too many of your interests come across as solitary ... reading, IT, Nintendo. What is a girl going to get out of this relationship?

    Also, I echo the point about searching for someone "good looking". Firstly, beauty really is in the eyes of the beholder, so one person's Venus will be another person's Medusa. Secondly, not wishing to be insensitive, but ... your photos ... I'm looking at a slightly smug geek with a beer glass. Not really romance material. For goodness sake, could you not find a mate to take a decent picture of you in a wooly sweater and wellies, set against the beautiful backdrop of the Yorkshire Dales ... or displaying a magnificent fishing trophy beside a river ... or ...?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Agree with what other people have said about the honest and trustworthy bit - that is something soooo many guys say and to be honest it is up to other people to work out that you are those things. Also agree with BG - saying they have to be good looking would be off putting for me, because it is obvious you're after someone who you would be physically attracted to.

    Also the strapline at the top - are you the key to my heart? - just sounds a bit full on in my opinion.

    I think the problem is you make yourself sound like someone who is on there to assess every woman he talks to with a relationship in mind, which will just put a lot of women off - they might just want to get to know you, have some very casual, lighthearted chat, and if something comes of it then great, but if it doesn't then it doesn't.

    Also generally I do think you'll find as a man you will just have a harder time on dating websites than women - women tend to be largely overwhelmed with messages from all sorts of men, so don't always take time to go through the profiles of lots of guys themselves looking for someone to talk to. I know when I was single and getting a lot of attention from men even just on social networking sites, I would rarely message anyone back unless they said something particularly interesting, or something that related to something I had put on my profile, rather than just a "hi how are you" or "I think you're beautiful" type of message.

    Keep at it though!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    FireFly85 wrote: »
    Agree with what other people have said about the honest and trustworthy bit - that is something soooo many guys say and to be honest it is up to other people to work out that you are those things. Also agree with BG - saying they have to be good looking would be off putting for me, because it is obvious you're after someone who you would be physically attracted to.

    Also the strapline at the top - are you the key to my heart? - just sounds a bit full on in my opinion.

    I think the problem is you make yourself sound like someone who is on there to assess every woman he talks to with a relationship in mind, which will just put a lot of women off - they might just want to get to know you, have some very casual, lighthearted chat, and if something comes of it then great, but if it doesn't then it doesn't.

    Also generally I do think you'll find as a man you will just have a harder time on dating websites than women - women tend to be largely overwhelmed with messages from all sorts of men, so don't always take time to go through the profiles of lots of guys themselves looking for someone to talk to. I know when I was single and getting a lot of attention from men even just on social networking sites, I would rarely message anyone back unless they said something particularly interesting, or something that related to something I had put on my profile, rather than just a "hi how are you" or "I think you're beautiful" type of message.

    Keep at it though!

    Amen to this.

    Don't make your profile sound desperate mate. Keep it short, interesting and try and get something that will reel people in to talk to you.
    They don't want to know about you making a website in dreamweaver. Some people might find that interesting, but if i wasn't bothered by that, i wouldn't go on a woman's profile who said she was into dreamweaver if you get me.

    Echoing what has already been said about your car - not many women will be bothered what you drive and they will care even less about what is mechanically wrong with it.

    Get rid of that bit.

    Your work info reads a tad like a cv - give us more details about what you really want to do:

    At the moment, I work as a XXXXX in a factory. I've just applied for my dream job as Hamish Bond (James' half brother) - getting all his cast offs and clearing up after him. It's not great, but the money is good and I occassionally find a couple of extra quid.:hyper:
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