Being pressurised into having a relationship

Former Member

This may turn into a rant, sorry:

I'm 20 and have never had a boyfriend, which doesn't bother me in the slightest. However, it bothers other people, who are saying that I'm missing out on so much. (what, exactly?)

Anyway, there's someone who can't seem to understand that I could not care less about being single. She has now decided she's going to try and find me a boyfriend. She will not take no for an answer.

Couple of questions:
am I really missing out on not having a boyfriend?
how on earth do I get her to stop this? She won't take no for an answer

Former Member

Melian wrote: »

This may turn into a rant, sorry:

I'm 20 and have never had a boyfriend, which doesn't bother me in the slightest. However, it bothers other people, who are saying that I'm missing out on so much. (what, exactly?)

Tell them to shut up, or at least to be helpful like introducing you to someone. Didn't even read the rest of the post. Those people are annoying.

good attitude, btw. You'll see soon enough that a relationship has it ups and downs.

Former Member

Being single has its pros and cons just like being with someone does. You're only 20, nothing wrong with not having a boyfriend yet and it should be you who decides when you want to start seeing someone! Just tell your friend that you really don't appreciate what she's doing and you are perfectly happy with things the way they are. If she won't accept that she isn't a good friend.

Former Member

Do what you want to do. Politely rebuff the other person and if they don't take the hint tell them straight. I've had to do this for the last ten years :rolleyes: People will always take it upon themselves to help you out. A lot of them seem to think that everyone wants the same domestic bliss they have and cannot understand why you wouldn't want it.
I don't want marriage and 2.4 kids like most of my mates. I tend to do eccentric relationships which suit me lovely

I had a situation at a party on saturday where a person from the pub i go in (not really a friend) grabbed me as soon as i walked in and tried to drag me to meet this "friend" of hers. I bluntly told her i wasn't interested and walked off. You'd think this would have worked. Noo instead an hour later as i walked past she hijacked me and forced an introduction on me. I was probably quite rude as i waved said hello and then goodbye and walked off. I don't do being set up as i find it awkward and it makes me go very standoffish.

Former Member

StrubbleS, Fruit Loop and Carolina have hit the nail on the head.

As they say, tell her that you appreciate she's only trying to help, but you'll find someone in your own time I made the mistake of seeing the first guy that showed an interest in me and soon realised that it's really not worth going out with someone for the sake of going out with someone. Not that I realised that was what I was doing at the time - I just think I was flattered by the attention and, the novelty value of the situation clouded the fact that I didn't really fancy him - he was a nice enough guy, but very different from me, there was no chemistry there and I soon started feeling awkward when I clocked that he liked me way more than I liked him. An embarrassing 3 weeks. A few months later I met my current boyfriend and realised that's how you're meant to feel when seeing someone you really have the hots for. It's worth waiting for, rather than farting about with random guys just because you feel (or are made to feel by so called mates) that's what you're meant to do.

Former Member

Orrrrrr

Just let her set you up and see how it goes. You might like it.

Former Member

Mist wrote: »

Orrrrrr

Just let her set you up and see how it goes. You might like it.

True. It could be fun. Just don't see it as a big deal or feel that it has to lead to anything if you don't click with whoever she sets you up with. Just treat it as a fun night out and if things do go anywhere...then fantastic :thumb: