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HELP! Im in love with my best friend.

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi, this will make more sense if you have the back story first. I moved to a new school a few years ago and as I have never ben very good socially only made a couple of friends, one of them a girl in my tutor group. We got on fine until last year I got severly depressed ofter the death of a mutual friend. As we helped each other through the depression we became even closer emotionally, but I began to realise that I cared about and for her more than a friend should. Jumping forward to about a month and a half ago, at my birthday party (16 w00t) we kissed but since then she has been very weird, not exactly avoiding me but cutting off conversations and not remaining in a room any longer than is nessescary to say hi before leaving. Now even with this my feelings for her have only got stronger and I dont know what to do.

All help is much appreciated

Thanks, Tom

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi, this will make more sense if you have the back story first. I moved to a new school a few years ago and as I have never ben very good socially only made a couple of friends, one of them a girl in my tutor group. We got on fine until last year I got severly depressed ofter the death of a mutual friend. As we helped each other through the depression we became even closer emotionally, but I began to realise that I cared about and for her more than a friend should. Jumping forward to about a month and a half ago, at my birthday party (16 w00t) we kissed but since then she has been very weird, not exactly avoiding me but cutting off conversations and not remaining in a room any longer than is nessescary to say hi before leaving. Now even with this my feelings for her have only got stronger and I dont know what to do.

    All help is much appreciated

    Thanks, Tom

    Seems like she is not interested. Could be tho that she is doing what you should be doing if no relationship is possible: keep contact to a minimum and relate as little as possible with this person. Have an open chat with her and how she feels about it. Be prepared tho, that it's not going to work in your favor. Speaking from experience and stories of friends it's very rare that you get together with a mere friend.

    Since you are having not much to do with each other at the mo, this will work in your favor if she rejects you. You'll get over it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Falling for you mate isn't always easy. It sounds like you have a really close friendship that you wouldn't want to lose but since you kissed she has been acting quite distant.

    She may be just as confused as you and not sure how you feel so it's worth trying what Strubbles suggested and talking things through. I guess the question is if she does just want to stay friends and nothing more then would you be able to cope with that? You may need some distance for a while to get over it before you can hang out like you used to but it sounds like this friendship if anything is worth saving?

    Hope it works out for you :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks to you both, I'm going to try talking it out as you suggested but I just hope that we can remain friends as this is (was?) one of my best friendships

    Thx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if you tell her you're not interested (however hard it may be) she might return to "normal". Maybe she's avoiding you because she's confused as to what you want to happen, if that makes sense.

    Talk to her :)

    Good luck!
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