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"getting wet"

Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary GuruPosts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
hi guys,
pleas ehelp if you can, any answers would be very welcome,

i dont find it hard to be turned on by my partner as i find him very attractive and sexy in every way, but i do find it hard to "get wet" and to stay wet and i dont know why this is as i love everything that my partner does to me but he says that i am not wet and he finds sex uncomfortable i am finding this very distressing and i am not sure what to do.

i hope this is going to give me some answers

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    try lubericants, it works for old people, so it should work for you

    i think the best deal is ForPlay De Luxe Gel PLUS as it comes with everything you need
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    789789 wrote: »
    try lubericants, it works for old people, so it should work for you

    Is that speaking from experience? :naughty: hehe

    I dont know bout the old people bit, but lubricants do help if youre finding yourself a tad dry when you want to be in the mood...and theres some interesting flavoured ones out atm! havent tried them myself though...:razz:
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    my partner refuses to use lubricants he says it is detremental to his manhood that he would have to do that to have sex with me, im not sure if there is a miss wiring in my brain that is not connecting to my vigina to tell it to lubricate i dont think its a psychological thing maybe i just need to retrain my mind to think sexually, iam turned on by him i just dont get wet enough and dont stay wet
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tell him that being so immature is "detrimental to his manhood." Say you're either going to use the lubricant or he's not getting any. Don't let him try and make you feel guilty about it. I think he needs to grow up a bit before engaging in such an adult activity tbh.
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tell him he's obviously not doing something right if youre not getting wet.

    He sounds like an idiot imo :D

    It may well be a psychological thing bottleblonde - do you feel under pressure to perform when youre with him?
    If youre not totally relaxed then that might be an issue.
    Do you indulge in much foreplay?
    Also do you get wet if you are by yourself?
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Really there's nothing for your man to be ashamed of in using lubricant. Plenty of women can have this problem and it can be affected by many things including your menstrual cycle, alcohol intake or breastfeeding; it often has nothing at all to do with him not turning you on. Perhaps if you can explain this to him he might change his mind and once you've got back in to the swing of things with the help of some lubricant you may feel more librated so that you no longer need it.
    The fact that it's become a worry for you probably isn't helping and once you can get over that you may well find things get easier :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    he says that every other woman he has been with he has never had to use lubricant and will never use it. he says that every woman has the ability to produce the lubrication and enough of it there body and mind just needs to be unlocked
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    he says that every other woman he has been with he has never had to use lubricant and will never use it. he says that every woman has the ability to produce the lubrication and enough of it there body and mind just needs to be unlocked

    Every woman is different! Some produce more than others. I have sometimes had to use lube...it can also depend on different times in your cycle. It is either use lube if you need it or no sex. If you have sex and you are not wet enough it can cause friction which is just not nice :no:
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What an arse your boyfriend sounds like. He's trying to manipulate you emotionally or something by saying you are making him feel bad for something your body is doing naturally. Different people get different amounts of wetness. Lube is good.
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    what does detrimental to his manhood mean?

    Damaging to his ego, or damaging to his reproductive organs.

    If it's second, then ask why (allergies?) there is different stuff out there with different formulas.

    If it's the first I do not even understand that? As long as your boyfriend cannot ooze juice along his shaft to lubricate whatever hole his penis is going in, the lubrication is provided by a buy able product or the woman's vagoo. So I do not understand why it's detrimental to his manhood if he hardly contributes to lubrication while sexing. So it's rather a "woman's problem" and not something he is "doing wrong" (if you understand. Opposed to viagra, which is the "man's problem".)

    If he is that stupid maybe talk some sense into him or withhold sex until his needs beat his manhood in a cage fight.
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Strubbles I think it's because he is stupid, but he seems a woman's wetness as directly proportional to the amount of arousal he is able to give her, therefore if she is not wet enough he is stupid enough to think that it's because of his lack of sexing skills.
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    he says that every other woman he has been with he has never had to use lubricant and will never use it. he says that every woman has the ability to produce the lubrication and enough of it there body and mind just needs to be unlocked

    Then he's an idiot and doesn't understand that physiology differs between everybody everywhere!!
    I don't exactly have a wealth of experience, but I've been with both types of women, and there are pros and cons to both. Well-lubed up is fun because you don't need to worry, but if you need lube, it's just an excuse to do more things with it!

    A little imagination overcomes (heh) any hurdle :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ShyBoy wrote: »
    Strubbles I think it's because he is stupid, but he seems a woman's wetness as directly proportional to the amount of arousal he is able to give her, therefore if she is not wet enough he is stupid enough to think that it's because of his lack of sexing skills.

    I realized that, therefore I am thinking for a fitting analogy that would make him realize it's not like that (like women suffering from a medical condition that 100% prevents lubrication in every circumstance and there is nothing man can do), but I'm stumped.

    Similar to why some girls think they are not good enough, because the partner's looking at porn occasionally, but I just can't find a fitting analogy.

    /e: In reality he's not making himself stand in a good light, because he thinks he is not able to make her wet and therefore failing (or he blames the girl, because she is blocked because of a trauma), lol. I don't know.
  • Former MemberFormer Member The Mix Honorary Guru Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It might be worth suggesting something ling Durex Play lubes. I really enjoy using the 'tingle' one (which does what it says on the tin). I rarely need to use it for the lubrication, I just love the way it feels. Maybe you can 'sell' him the idea of trying it for the different sensation it will give you both
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