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a quick vent

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
So i told my mate that i self harm. its good in a way that i can talk to him an tell him how i feel. but he tells me that he worries about me and that makes me feel bad. being on easter break i havent spoken to him for a few days. Before that i told him i had harming urges and since then have given in to them. :grump: But when we speak next i dont want to tell him i gave in cos i dont want him to blame himself for not being able to speak to me.

Also ive been looking at a lot of things giving ways to stop or distractions, but i dont want to stop- if that doesnt sound to weird!which scares me cos i dont like to think that i like it :impissed:

Comments

  • luc_bluc_b Posts: 45 Boards Initiate
    Hi dr chimpenstien

    I think that’s great you’ve told your friend about what you’re going through. It can’t have been easy and it must have taken a lot of courage to open up.

    As you say, it’s great that you can tell him how you feel. Try not to feel bad for telling him that you self harmed again, he's bound to be pleased that you trust him enough to tell him at all.

    In terms of ways to stop, it’s common not to want to stop and so that doesn’t sound weird at all! When you feel ready, why not take a look at Steps to recovery, which will hopefully give you some useful advice on the some initial actions you can take. Additionally, you can see how others are going through similar problems and how they're seeking advice.

    Let us know how things go with you’re friend and take care of yourself :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hi

    hi

    it is good that you have someone you can talk too, just to know that there is someone who cares is really good.
    it is not weird that you have been looking at ways to stop but dont want to, I have been doing that too, only stop when you feel ready.
    your only worries because he cares about you, so try not to feel guilty about that.

    hope everything goes well with your friend, let us know.:)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    true true!

    new problems now! im going clothes shopping with me mum tomorrow and im worried that she'll see the scratches on me arm :S ive been wearing long sleave tops to hide them but you'd be able to see them in a t shirt :( EeeeP!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey

    well done for telling your friend: I know its really hard to do! I've only trusted one friend so far.

    I completely know what you mean though- about your mum and about wanting to stop but not wanting to.
    I'm concious of my arms all the time now- i'm lucky because i always wear bracelets so it covers my arm scars, but theoneson my stomach can be seen if i wear certain jeans, so i'm very concious about them!
    Mabye if your mum did find out it could be beneficial? I dont know what the relationship is like between you two, but if you have a good relationship, mabye she could help you too?

    Just try to hurt youself less each time, and mabye cut back on the amount of times in a week you do it.
    And although you dont want your friend to feel guilty, youre lucky to have a friend who cares. Dont tell them until you feel ready mabye, but dont shut them out completely. Mabye you could talk to them next time you feel the need to hurt yourself? Call them up, get on msn, text them, whatever!

    Let us know how youre getting on :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    update

    So i went shopping today. got some new clothes which is always good!
    Kept on dreading trying on tops in case me mum saw the cuts on my arm. i dont think she did; well i hope not. they look more like cat scratches anyway. its not that i dont mind her knowing it's just i dont want to put any stress or worry on her.
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