Home Sex & Relationships
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

2 loves

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
hi

ive been with my boyfriend for a few years and we recently moved in together but i have fallen for my next door neighbour. I see him daily and we have become friends, everytime i look or talk to him i get butterflies in my stomach. i think about him all the time and even fall asleep thinking about him. I cant decide if its just lust because of the commitment of moving in with my boyfriend or i do actually love him.
My boyfriend and me have been rocky from the start and at the moment all we do is fight. I dont feel the same way about him anymore. Im so confused.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hello!

    I think first it's good that you've recognised that it might just be because you've made a commitment step. Maybe the thrill in this neighbour is the knowledge that you can't have them? Since you're now living with your boyfriend maybe the idea of someone else is exciting to you.

    You really need to consider how you really feel about this boyfriend. Were you ready to move in with him or were you just going with the flow?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    we moved in togther out of convience as we both needed somewhere to live at the time it seemed like a good idea but now im not so sure.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sounds like you n ur boyfriend have made a big decision without thinking about it properly. especially if ur arguing alot

    maybe sort that first

    n the neighbour thing..its best to call it a day wit ur BF or..block the feelings for him.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Why on earth would you want to move in with somebody you describe your relationship as "rock from the start"?!

    Surely that is doomed?!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    why exactly do you move together with someone you constantly fight? hummm.

    /e: lol g_angel, same thought.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I agree. Maybe you should move out and find someplace else. That would remove bad feelings in your current relationship and get rid of your neighbour!

    The chances are that you and yr bf are arguing all the time at the moment because you weren't ready to move in together.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    when we moved in together we didnt fight, it was good at first, yes it was a rushed decision but it felt right. he supported me through a very rough patch, and now i cant hurt him as he such a good person but my feeling for my neighbour wont go away as much as i have tried to distance myself from him
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Moving in with someone can be stressful, but it's not meant to be totally unhappy. Maybe sort out how you feel about your boyfriend first, I mean the other guy might have a girlfriend? Whatever happens, don't ever feel trapped, it may have been convenient at the time, but there's no harm in holding your hand up and saying "it just didn't work out". Is there someone else you could go & stay with for a while, till you decide. I mean can you see yourself married & having children with your current boyfriend? you don't say how old you are, but I'm sure you have plenty time. Don't settle for second best!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    NavyBlue wrote: »
    Moving in with someone can be stressful, but it's not meant to be totally unhappy. Maybe sort out how you feel about your boyfriend first, I mean the other guy might have a girlfriend? Whatever happens, don't ever feel trapped, it may have been convenient at the time, but there's no harm in holding your hand up and saying "it just didn't work out". Is there someone else you could go & stay with for a while, till you decide. I mean can you see yourself married & having children with your current boyfriend? you don't say how old you are, but I'm sure you have plenty time. Don't settle for second best!

    thank you, i have decided to stay at a friends for a while, i dont see a future with him, i am only 22 so im not looking to settle down, it was meant to be care free but some how it became serious and its not what i wanted
Sign In or Register to comment.