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I'm counting my farts today

BillieTheBotBillieTheBot Posts: 8,724 Bot
Having read somewhere that the average man farts 15 times a day, I decided this morning to keep count when my first effort of the day was born. Me being one never to hold back when it comes to releasing methane, I thought I would score highly in this department. I am glad to report that I'm already on 11 and it's not even 10:00 a.m. I thought I'd better share this with you all, and will keep you posted with my progress through the day :p
Beep boop. I'm a bot.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LMAO erm ok:confused:

    *worrys sometimes*:p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    :eek: *holds nose*
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ... and just when I was about to say the quality in posts has gone downhill ;):D:p :rolleyes:

    LMAO
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    *places peg on nose*

    *feels sorry for anyone within close range of Aladdin today*

    :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You do realise that to make this statistically significant, you'll have to keep counting your farts. Actually, I think you should keep a record book - size, type, length, odour and location (geographic, not biological. Most people invariably fart from their arse).
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    (geographic, not biological. Most people invariably fart from their arse).

    :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Worries I'll explode as I havent dropped one yet! (today):D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I can fart using my fingers, as most of my posts lately can testify :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Turtle
    Most people invariably fart from their arse.

    Oh, dear. In that case, it's official - I'm abnormal.

    *couldn't resist* ;)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Worringly no additions since my last post. On the positive side I didn't have a heavy night yesterday so there's been no foul smell yet. Look forward to my daily dump at mid-afternoon where the count should go up.

    Oops, I bit of too much information for some I guess :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Most people invariably fart from their arse

    Girls are special though, they can fart from there back bottom and front bottom remember!!!
    Oh, dear. In that case, it's official - I'm abnormal.

    No no, all girls fart from there front bottom its perfectly healthy. Its also hysterical as well. If thats not what your talking about then yes you are abnormal :p


    PHrrrrrrrrrRRRrrrRrrRTTTTtttTTTTTTtttttYYyyyyyyyy
    (Longest Vaginal fart ever recorded: 22:00 25/11/01)

    :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LOL!:D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by wuckFit
    Longest Vaginal fart ever recorded: 22:00 25/11/01

    You reckon theres actually a guiness record for that, I've heard of stranger, I can just visualise this now

    *puts on dodgy news-reporter accent*

    "... The guiness book of records has sent over 1000 of its reporters to various locations in the world today in an attempt to record the longest vaginal fart, they will be sitting down for 2hr periods watching in close inspection to ensure that no members participating are cheating. Members have been expected to reframe from sex, beans and nights drinking 24hrs before commencing this test in an event to avoid foul play results."

    *slightly later.. in typical Formula one style reporting*

    "... did you look at that, after a short pause of 3 seconds, gwenth has taken the lead after an astounding visual and noise display, the crowd are going wild, have you ever seen something so breath taking.. this is surely going to be the highlight of the season"
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    "... The guiness book of records has sent over 1000 of its reporters to various locations in the world today in an attempt to record the longest vaginal fart, they will be sitting down for 2hr periods watching in close inspection to ensure that no members participating are cheating. Members have been expected to reframe from sex, beans and nights drinking 24hrs before commencing this test in an event to avoid foul play results."

    LOL at your post, class!! Me and RNT did a topic about it a while back. RNT created a formula for how the vaginal erruptions could be created. I will need to find it, it was really funny.

    I cant get a picture out of my head with a judge, holding a check list and a stop watch, closely watching 2 people having intercourse waiting to record the longest fart.

    Oh my day has been made so much better :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    oh the imagination of an idle mind!!!!!!!!:p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    oh my wuckfits cunningly changed the topic again

    It is rather worrying I know, I think I might have some sort of secret addiction that I didnt know about until now.

    Think I might visit the doctor, that would be interesting :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just for the record, the total count for the day was 17. Two above the average, that's not as bad as I had predicted. Today, by the way, I'm up to 15 and it's only 13:30. I remember one day I let rip 16 within a minute or two. I wonder what my day count was that day...
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