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i am utterly sick of myself...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
and my sexual habits.

(i've put it here as i see it as more of a mental health thing)

ended up sleeping with a friend of a friend last night...now i feel like i've completely betrayed myself and i am going back to my old ways of my sex addiction. I've also gone back to chronic mastibation, and i sort of understand why i do it, its a comfort thing - like some people suck their thumbs...well i get myself off 4 times a day. i hate hate hate this, and even though i'm going to psychoanalysis, i feel like i need to go put myself on a remote island away from anyone. I want to go smash so much shit up, and since it happened i've had 3 fits...i hadn't had any fits for over a month...

the thing i crave more than anything else is breaking me apart....

what can i do?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i dont know what to suggest, but it sounds really difficult for you.
    I guessed it was some sort of addiction by the way you spoke about it before.

    I hope you can get the help you need as it already sounds like its past the point that is healthy a bit.
    I hope the psychoanalysis helps
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey,

    I don't know what to say either... I have similar problems and there's days where I'm okay - normal, well, whatever normal is for me. And then there's days, I guess similar to what you described where I'm utterly fucking disgusted with myself and I think "God danny what the FUCK is wrong with you?" and there's this feeling of dirt and self-loathing that feels stained on my body and I never know what to do, so I hit things, bury my head in my hands... listen to music... anything. But worst of all: I tell myself I'll never do it again.

    Lying to myself like I always do, but never really learning...
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