courage needed?

Former Member

basically, the friend of mine who has a sex addiction which he now seems to be working on and is getting a lot better...well i've got an fallen for him quite badly...

oh dear, yes, i don't need a lecture here i've given myself enough...

So, rather than giving him an ultimatum, or saying the L word or anything too scary like that, i've decided that i just want to let him know how i feel and ask him to clarify his feelings towards me.

my major problem is....how the fuck do i actually do this? We're on the same course at uni and i did suggest he came over to mine and we worked on some project planning together...but he'd prefer to do it on his own. I've invited him over for new years but i'm not gonna do it then just incase it does go horribly wrong...

any ideas? I'm also shiting myself about it!

I'm giving him one last chance before i just drop the whole thing and move on...

Former Member

On that post you were on 6,666

Former Member

mwhaha! so does 6667 show a shread of humanity?

Former Member

Can't you just flirt with him and have a laugh on nye? If there's something there between you then things will progress on their own.

Former Member

no because i'll forever be confused and we're already gone past the flirting stage and a whole lot more...but just the once...

tis difficult!

Former Member

hi twisted trinity,

you had a good christmas?

I would just let nature take its course. I wouldn't make to much of a fuss just in case he doesn't have the same feelings and then you get hurt.
Hope all goes well.

Former Member

i couldn't care less about getting hurt, i've been hurt before and i'll be hurt again and i always will get over it...

I can't leave this one to chance...nature is crap when it comes to relationships...what i'm asking here for is suggestions about how i can approach the subject without freaking him out.

Former Member

Alright TT,(Guys Pov here)
Its ackward for a girl to walk up and be like how do you feel about me?...Trust me been there done that. Im here to say (sadly) You have to find a way to sneak a hint for him to tell hisn feelings about you~..(If possible)

Former Member

I think if you're trying to be really careful and sensitive about freaking him out then it will be all about the wording. If you've already been there and done that in terms of something physical and flirty then all that is going to be left is that final step of clarifying where you are with each other and you're just going to have to decide for yourself when is the right time for that. I know NYE doesn't feel quite right, but really, what difference will it make if you say it then or later?

So none of the 'love', none of the 'I've fallen for you'. Just the simplier - 'I like you as more then a friend and want to know if you like me more, and if there is any possibility that we could take it further'.

Or something along those lines which doesn't take away too much of your dignity and leave you feeling over-exposed and embarrassed. At the end of the day, if you want a response you're gonna have to ask the question, and that is never gonna be easy. Just out with it is all I can suggest and then you can pick up from whatever he leaves you with - whether its more or just friendship.

Former Member

i just can't seem to get him to come up to mine, and i'm not gonna turn up at his family home unanounced.

i can't do it over the phone can i?

Former Member

ok well i didn't see him last night, but thinks are getting more confusing and it seems like were playing mind games all the time and i just want to get all of this shite out into the open and stop playing silly games of i like you/ no i don't

Former Member

ok, things have got far more complicated now...

i've written him a letter, would it be ok to email it to him or do i need to give it to him in person?