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Wife doesn't get WET... HELP!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
This has been going on for some time now, there are obviously lots of details to this story but i want to keep the post short.

I am unable to make my wife wet. No matter what i do or how hard i try. i do everything she asks to try and get her wet.

The only way i can get her wet is if we are role playing and I am pretending to be someone else.

What should I do?

Help

Thanks!

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I will repeat what i said in your other thread!

    How did you used to make her wet? Was it easy? How long ago did it stop? Are there any medical reasons for this problem? Is she on any type of medication? Or going through any particular changes?

    I think it is a common problem, personally i experienced it in the later stages of my relationship with my ex, i suppose the excitement had gone, or if i'm dehydrated. These days i have problems with getting too wet!

    Maybe try going down on her, then she'll be wet. Slightly worrying that she needs to pretend you're someone else but whatever it takes to spice up your sex life is a good idea. You could try all the other stuff, sex toys, games etc etc.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The usual stuff would get her wet in the past, passionate kissing, touching, rubbing ets, or her just being horny for sex. she also hardly ever comes on to me. she occasionally asks me to make love to her but hardly ever just comes on to me.

    I know she has no medical reason not to get wet etc, as when we role play and i pretend to be someone else she gets REALLY wet.

    She says she still finds me attractive but just doesnt know why she doesnt get wet.

    I know she can get wet from just kissing, so i know she can get wet easily, but when its just me and her, i can kiss, touch and rub her for hours and nothing.

    I would gladly go down on her, but she always tells me she is too sensitive so i have to stop, we've tried games and sex toys but nothing gets her wet, i even use lube sometimes and imagine that she is wet.

    I dream that she gets wet for me. I really dont know what to do. She is wanting to start a family but i dont see my future being with someone who I clearly don't turn on.

    HELP!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hmmm tricky. It seems she's not being very helpful with this, does she think it's a problem? If you use a bit of lube to start with will she eventually get wet as the sex goes on? If she doesnt mind that method then ther'es not much wrong with it.

    Maybe concentrate on this kissing business, try and slow the process down and make it sexy. You should probably talk to her about the fact that she never initiates sex and what does turn her on, does she always want you to be dominant? Maybe she's just suffering from low libido, it is a common problem, particularly when women are on the pill.

    And about the going down on her, sensitive in a ticklish way? I think you should persist down this alleyway. Tell her you want to make it work for her and that she's to relax and help you make it pleasurable. Don't go directly for the clitoris to try and avoid it being too sensitive.

    If she wants you to make love to her maybe she needs some attention, not necesarily sex. She might like you to just cuddle her and kiss her and if she turns it into something more then thats good too.

    Are there any old memories that you could trigger to take it back to when you turned her on so easily? Does she still turn you on? Do you tell her she does? It is a big turn on to see how much you turn someone else on.

    I really hope it works out for you!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Grab her vagina by the labia and then shout into it "HELLO? IS THERE ANYONE HOME INSIDE THIS CAVERNOUS VAGINA?" I don't know if this helps, but hilarity will ensue.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont really like using lube. I occasionally use it and pretend that she has got wet, that makes me feel really good. She does get moist enough for us to have sex once i get inside her, but its the getting inside her that the awkward part because she is so dry.

    I would be happy to concentrate on the kissing etc, but after several minutes of kissing and touching, she always asks me to put it inside her. even though she is bone dry. and if i dont, then that can cause a bit of a dispute.

    I have spoken to her a million times about her never initiating sex. she used to do it all the time, the most I will get out of her now is her asking me to make love to her, but that isnt very often. She will very rarely start to touch me while we are in bed watching tv for example, but again, that rarely happens, but even when it does she is still bone dry.

    I have tried lots of different ways going down on her. even if i avoid the clitoris completely, she still pulls me back up after only a few minutes. despite that on a few occasions i have persisited and stayed down there and taken her all the way to an enjoyable orgasm.

    I give her hugs and cuddles all the time, we sit together every night close to each other and i always show her affection, nothing seems to work.

    She turns me on increadibly easily. a passionate kiss, the slightest touch, or if i see her undressing or naked i get turned on within seconds and always maintain an erection, she knows just how easily she can turn me on.

    It just seems that no matter what, i dont think anything works. She knows there is a big issue, but she seems to think that if we get on a little better and if we have sex several time a week for a few weeks that we are getting "better" and that our problems are going, but then when i tell her its pretty much still the same, it causes problems.

    I am really stuck. it is getting me so upset all the time and depressed. I really don't think it will ever change and i dont want to be stuck in a marriage for the rest of my life where the only way I can make my wife wet is when i pretend to be someone else. I cant cope with that. i dont know what to do.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    loads of people use lube. It isnt a reflection on your manliness. Getting wet is often a hormone reaction and it can vary according to loads of circumstances, time of her cycle etc. It sounds to me youre putting a lot of pressure on her for something out of her control - ie her bodys own reaction. She gets wet if you do role-play etc, thats a good start, Maybe she would prefer mpore exciting stuff like that as a more regular part of your sex life.

    I would be really annoyed with my partner if he kept telling me how disappointed he was about something like that. If you need lube and she appears to be enjoying it then whats the problem? If shes actually not aroused usually and thats why shes getting wet, then how come youre having sex anyway?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What do you mean by pretending to be someone else? Are we talking a bit of casual roleplay or REALLY prenteinding to be someone else. Perhaps she wants to be with someone else, hence no wet.
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