Home Politics & Debate
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options

Stock Exchange chaplain says gays should have health warnings tattooed on them

The Rev Dr Peter Mullen said in an blog that homosexuality was "clearly unnatural, a perversion and corruption of natural instincts and affections" and "a cause of fatal disease".

He recommended that homosexual practices be discouraged "after the style of warnings on cigarette packets".

He wrote: "Let us make it obligatory for homosexuals to have their backsides tattooed with the slogan SODOMY CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH and their chins with FELLATIO KILLS."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/religion/3145269/Homosexuals-should-carry-warning-tattoos-says-chaplain.html



Perhaps I will drop by the good chaplain's office and stick a few of these stickers on his holy books. Fair is fair, surely...

bible.jpg

Fucking twat :rolleyes:


Incidentally, I am quite puzzled (if not a bit interested) in this 'DEATH BY FELLATIO' business. How can I research this further? :)
Beep boop. I'm a bot.

Comments

  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yea I think he was trying to be satirical but I'm guessing he has ulterior motives.
    But the rector insisted that he meant to harm: "I wrote some satirical things on my blog and anybody with an ounce of sense of humour or any understanding of the tradition of English satire would immediately assume that they're light-hearted jokes. I certainly have nothing against homosexuals. Many of my dear friends have been and are of that persuasion. What I have got against them is the militant preaching of homosexuality."

    What militant preaching of homosexuality, dare I ask?
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    minimi38 wrote: »
    That's what he claims now, of course.

    His underlaying profound homophobia is quite obvious throughout his blog entry I thought.

    But in any case, whether he was joking is beside the point. Well, unless you think it would have been okay as well to make 'jokes' about Jews and gypsies having "ADDICTED TO MONEY" and "WARNING: YOUR WATCH IS AT RISK WITH ME AROUND" respectively tattooed on their foreheads.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ShyBoy wrote: »
    Yea I think he was trying to be satirical but I'm guessing he has ulterior motives.



    What militant preaching of homosexuality, dare I ask?
    Exactly. He's a bursting-at-the-seams homophobe and no mistake.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The CofE are talking about disciplining him, so it seems they take this seriously.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I certainly have nothing against homosexuals. Many of my dear friends have been and are of that persuasion.

    :lol: Racists always seem to coincidentally have a black best mate. And homophobes always seem to have a gay best friend. Convenient. Sarah Palin gushes about her closest gay friend - and then calls homosexuality a 'choice' she doesn't agree with... :rolleyes: Given the C of E's claims to tolerance he should resign.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    One man of religion comes out with a stupid comment then suddenly it's open season on Christianity.

    Giggedy giggedy I'm a-getting out of here.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Somebody commenting on the story (Telegraph) makes a really good point..
    As a 15 year old boy who is gay and aspires to go into the field of finance and economics, I find your comments despicable and destructive. Surely, you can see how damaging your outrageous comments are to the wellbeing of our society and especially to the already low levels of self-esteem and high rate of poor mental health and suicides in teenagers?

    Homophobic bullying in schools is endemic.

    The facts from Stonewall's report are disturbing. There's more suicides, more self harm and lower educational achievements amongst lesbian/gay/bi/trans students because of bullying... most LGBT people don't have kids, it's straight people's kids who are suffering - straight Britain needs to do more, it can't just be left to organisations like Stonewall. To be fair the LibDems and Labour are really progressive - lets just hope that if Cameron gets back in the Conservatives don't go back to their old ways. Labour's big failure has been promoting religious schools though - where this chaplain's views are commonplace.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Labour's big failure has been promoting religious schools though - where this chaplain's views are commonplace.

    To be fair they probably don't teach that it should be made 'obligatory for homosexuals to have their backsides tattooed with the slogan SODOMY CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH'.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    He's obviously not living in the real world.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    There's more suicides, more self harm and lower educational achievements amongst lesbian/gay/bi/trans students because of bullying... most LGBT people don't have kids, it's straight people's kids who are suffering - straight Britain needs to do more, it can't just be left to organisations like Stonewall.

    True but what majority of the gay population (I wont say community, that doesn't exist) portray themselves, as nearly all of this bullying is aiming at? Pride, 'campness'? Those alone don't help the situation between gay people and straight people. Pride if anything is withdrawing gay people from society. I personally hate anything that is aimed towards being gay, the rainbow for instance, who's idea was it to use that as a symbol? It's an embarasement and shamefull to follow it.

    The people who parade about getting 'equal rights' in society are the root cause of the problems, sticking it in someones face and increasing the never ending fact of what a gay person looks, acts and speaks like isn't helping.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    To provide some context and so people can jusge the claims of satire themselves - here's the google cached version of the original post from the blog
    Matthew Parris
    Matthew Parris is wilfully refusing to give his readers his opinion about the recent "gay wedding" and about relationships between the church and homosexuals generally. He says, "When it comes to the church, synagogue or mosque, if you think the whole thing ridiculous, its hard to get excited about the ridiculousness of a subset of it. I should feel the same if morris dancers or the British Astrological Society tried to exclude gays."

    So, for Parris, the views of billions of Christians, Jews and Muslims worldwide are of no more consequence than a couple of obscure sectional interests. From what point of privileged judgement does he thus discount 4000 years of civilisation? The great world religions have survived the criticisms of far more intelligent and better informed opponents than the ignorant upstart Parris. There is a whole history and literature of distinguished apologetics for religious belief, but Parris will attend to none of it - sufficient only to attract his disdain is mainstream religion's disapproval of homosexual acts.

    Since Parris will not dirty his hands by entering theological discussions with his readers, perhaps I might answer for religious believers in the purely utilitarian terms which even the lofty Parris is bound to engage with. We disapprove of homosexuality because it is clearly unnatural, a perversion and corruption of natural instincts and affections, and because it is a cause of fatal disease. The AIDS pandemic was originally caused by promiscuous homosexual behaviour. Such promiscuity is itself an evil because its perpetrators merely use others indiscriminately for their own gratification, treating their fellows as sex objects and as means to an end rather than as ends in themselves. I should have thought that Parris, having rejected religious belief, might want to construct his moral beliefs on this Kantian humanistic imperative. But I suspect he is not really interested in morality of any kind - except as a special plea to excuse his lust for gratification at whatever cost to human dignity and the sanctity of human life.

    It is time that religious believers began to recommend specific utilitarian discouragements of homosexual practices after the style of warnings on cigarette packets: Let us make it obligatory for homosexuals to have their backsides tattooed with the slogan SODOMY CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH and their chins with FELLATIO KILLS. In addition the obscene "gay pride" parades and carnivals should be banned for they give rise to passive corruption, comparable to passive smoking. Young people forced to witness these excrescences are corrupted by them.

    Let me continue the comparison with smoking which is banned in most public places. Those committing homosexual acts in public places - such behaviour being a crime in any case under the Homosexual Reform Act of 1967 - should be arrested, tried and punished. Parks, open spaces and public lavatories would at once become more wholesome places. There ought to be teaching films shown in sex education classes in all our schools. These would portray acts of sodomy and the soundtrack would reinforce the message that it is a filthy practice ending with the admonition: "We do, after all, know the importance of washing our hands after going to the lavatory."

    But I should like to turn Parris' disdain for religion back on to him. If I consider that homosexual practices are vile, why should I concern myself with subsets of their aspects? I might as well concern myself with other minor irrelevancies such as the Doris Day fanclub and polo-neck sweaters

    From http://216.239.59.104/search?q=cache:8CVjPdAIrYQJ:petermullen.typepad.com/+peter+mullen+blog&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=uk&client=firefox-a

    (If that link doesn't work you can grab it from the Guardian) To be honest I understand what he's trying to do, somehow shock Parris or others who see the church as irrevelant into responding, but it's not satire is it? That's polemic - and as such it doesn't really get to be excused as humour - at least in my reading.

    And as to the wider issues - I do have issues with the idea that being different in society means it's somehow your own fault when you are treated inequally. There's nothing wrong with being gay, and the attitude of - 'if you'd just stop acting gay and stay in the closet you wouldn't be bullied' is pretty much highlights exactly why this inequality is something that should be challenged and protested against.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    The people who parade about getting 'equal rights' in society are the root cause of the problems


    20060308123057-votes-for-women.jpg



    18989782.jpg



    Yeah, I can see how women and blacks brought it all upon themselves as well...
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Aladdin wrote: »
    20060308123057-votes-for-women.jpg



    18989782.jpg



    Yeah, I can see how women and blacks brought it all upon themselves as well...

    Heh nice pic but I think his point was more the sub culture of gayness. I.e 'we're here, we're queer, get used to it!' and all the dressing up as 'gay' whatever that is.

    There is no reason why people who are gay need to subscribe to the scene and many don't. That scene probably on balance further segregates gay people from straight people - though the other argument is in normal society there are so few gay people (between 2% and 10% depending who you listen to) you could find it hard to find other gay people to relate to and indeed just date...

    Just thought I'd throw that in as my interpretation of what JavaKrypt was saying.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ShyBoy wrote: »
    Heh nice pic but I think his point was more the sub culture of gayness. I.e 'we're here, we're queer, get used to it!' and all the dressing up as 'gay' whatever that is.

    There is no reason why people who are gay need to subscribe to the scene and many don't. That scene probably on balance further segregates gay people from straight people - though the other argument is in normal society there are so few gay people (between 2% and 10% depending who you listen to) you could find it hard to find other gay people to relate to and indeed just date...

    Just thought I'd throw that in as my interpretation of what JavaKrypt was saying.
    People should be used to the idea of some peeps being gay and queer. In any case that portrayal of gay marches is a very simplified and distorted one. Gay Pride marches started, and continue to this day, as a protest against bigotry and a day of celebration. People dress up just like people dress up for the Notting Hill Carnival or countless other festivities. And it's also a 'fuck you' message to those few people who say homosexuality is an abomination and gays should be "ashamed".

    Frankly I fail to see how anyone of an open mind could possibly be annoyed (let alone offended) some people celebrating and fooling around on a parade one day a year. It's not as if the men and women wearing silly costums and "acting queer" during the such marches do that every other day of the year during their normal working lives is it? Anyone who has problem with how people act and dress on a demo one day a year is a bit fucked up IMO. There is one easy solution to the problem anyway: don't attend the demo and don't watch it on TV.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's what I meant Shy :) I wasn't generally saying asking for equal rights is a bad thing, but it's a bad thing when you do it in a way that doesn't help the situation - Pride is now to most gay people as a place to go to get drunk and have some random sex - is that REALLY how getting accepted into society works? Either way, acceptance isn't a big issue, I don't have a problem with homophobic people it's their choice to hate gay people, as long as they realise gay people don't choose to be gay - and that we're not all queens.
    And it's also a 'fuck you' message to those few people who say homosexuality is an abomination and gays should be "ashamed".

    I'm ashamed of pride. I'd prefer to tell the ones who support pride every year "fuck you, you should be ashamed". You'd be surprized of how many gay people hate pride and the whole gay scene. I don't hate the idea, but I hate the fact it's lost ALL meaning of what it's supposed to get across. Surely they could parade for equal rights for everyone instead of themselves just because of their sexuality?
    There is one easy solution to the problem anyway: don't attend the demo and don't watch it on TV.

    it shouldn't be on TV in the first place. It's not something that you should watch for a bit of fun. Last pride when they put it on the 6 oclock news - why? they never showed a single (straight acting) gay person, they shown what the stereotype says we are, queens, camps, cross dressers, whores.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    I'm ashamed of pride. I'd prefer to tell the ones who support pride every year "fuck you, you should be ashamed". You'd be surprized of how many gay people hate pride and the whole gay scene. I don't hate the idea, but I hate the fact it's lost ALL meaning of what it's supposed to get across. Surely they could parade for equal rights for everyone instead of themselves just because of their sexuality?
    I see what you mean, and one day, hopefully, one's sexual orientation should be about as relevant to others as whether they prefer tea to coffee. But for as long as there are people out there claiming it is wrong to be homosexual, I'm all for those who are homosexual to celebrate in the loudest possible way.

    it shouldn't be on TV in the first place. It's not something that you should watch for a bit of fun. Last pride when they put it on the 6 oclock news - why? they never showed a single (straight acting) gay person, they shown what the stereotype says we are, queens, camps, cross dressers, whores.
    You do realise that many of those will be straight? I am, and I've spent plenty of time dancing and celebrating at gay marches and festivals.

    Frankly, only an extraordinarily stupid person could possibly think all (or even most) gays are ultra camp drag queens because of Gay Pride, any more than they might believe all Brazilian women walk around with tight bikinies on and feathers on their heads, on account of footage of the Rio Carnival...
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    I'm ashamed of pride. I'd prefer to tell the ones who support pride every year "fuck you, you should be ashamed". You'd be surprized of how many gay people hate pride and the whole gay scene. I don't hate the idea, but I hate the fact it's lost ALL meaning of what it's supposed to get across. Surely they could parade for equal rights for everyone instead of themselves just because of their sexuality?

    Dude, the fact that you and I can even be openly gay is because we stand on the shoulders of giants - people who went out and in some cases, took their lives in their hands to be themselves, and opened the eyes of a close-minded society.

    Gay Pride, although more of a party and a celebration of our society these days, is also a political reminder that we cannot be swept under the carpet again. The day that our society does not blink an eye if a man is seen holding hands with another man in public, when a man can kiss another man without people throwing their hands up and accusing us of damaging the country's morals, when gay people can book into any hotel without fear of prejudice, when a gay relationship is held with the same respect as a straight relationship, there will be no more need for gay pride. The gay bashings that go on every weekend in this country, proves we are not there yet.

    I would imagine from your postings on this subject, that you are not an 'out' gay man, and you fear that other peoples' campness will reflect badly on you. Well, I go on the gay scene quite a lot and MOST gay people are not as over the top as you imply. Yes, the 'screaming queen' types may get the headlines and are very visible, but they are a minority. Most of us get on with our lives, with our heads down and live our lives as we want to live .. quietly .. as any other person in our society.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was going to say something but Teagan put it better... bravo!

    Please don't assume that those of us who are open about our sexuality are rubbing it in people's faces. I will hold hands with my girlfriend if I wish, I will certainly not deny her existence, and I will contest homophobic remarks made in my hearing (as I would racist, sexist, disablist...) but that doesn't make me a militant, it does not mean I am preaching homosexuality and it damn sure does not mean I want to convert people.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Aladdin wrote: »
    I see what you mean, and one day, hopefully, one's sexual orientation should be about as relevant to others as whether they prefer tea to coffee. But for as long as there are people out there claiming it is wrong to be homosexual, I'm all for those who are homosexual to celebrate in the loudest possible way.

    :yippe:
    Frankly, only an extraordinarily stupid person could possibly think all (or even most) gays are ultra camp drag queens because of Gay Pride, any more than they might believe all Brazilian women walk around with tight bikinies on and feathers on their heads, on account of footage of the Rio Carnival...

    :yes:

    You speak so much sense on this kinda stuff, far more than a lot of gay people actually. :) (Going slight off the issue but interesting to note that there's actually a lot of bigotry within the gay community - the LGBT community isn't really united. Trans people, bi people and oddly gay people who aren''t 'straight-acting' seem to sometimes get a hard time from 'their' own community).
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would imagine from your postings on this subject, that you are not an 'out' gay man, and you fear that other peoples' campness will reflect badly on you. Well, I go on the gay scene quite a lot and MOST gay people are not as over the top as you imply. Yes, the 'screaming queen' types may get the headlines and are very visible, but they are a minority. Most of us get on with our lives, with our heads down and live our lives as we want to live .. quietly .. as any other person in our society.

    I'm 'out' as it's put to friends and my brother, but I don't plan on coming out, the only issue that needs to be fixed is the general thoughts of people towards sexuality. So many times I've been asked "Got a girlfreind yet?" Even by people who know, it doesn't register as it exists in this world. Changing peoples minds on such a high scale like that is almost impossible, so the point of a parade once a year doesn't change anything whatsoever, well not for the better.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    Changing peoples minds on such a high scale like that is almost impossible, so the point of a parade once a year doesn't change anything whatsoever, well not for the better.

    I disagree. In all respect, I don't think you quite understand the motive behind Gay Pride events. It's because of putting ourselves under the spotlight like that in the past, that you are even able to come out to your brother and friends without fear of reprisal. You are blinkered by a spectacle which you personally do not approve of. That's fair enough. I have only ever been to one Gay Pride event myself but I am still glad that it goes on. You may not approve of Gay Pride but the fact that it is out there, means that it is discussed. I think that is a good thing.

    By the by, even on these boards and after some heated discussions of gay related issues, I have noticed a couple of people's attitudes have softened towards gay people. It's good to get the debate out in the open so that people can confront their own possible prejudices/misunderstanding.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Surely just talking about it, and making it generally accepted through talking about it (By gay people themselves first.) Would do more and have more of an inpact on peoples views and general feelings towards it instead of dressing up for one day and getting out the rainbow flags?

    Put it this way, if I was in a club and a guy who acted camp said to me, he's straight, I'd think, really? That's how the majority works - so changing that stereotype first needs to end the public displays OF the stereotype. Then if I started talking to another guy who 'acted straight' and looked the same, then we'd think he's straight - the more people see that being camp doesn't mean you're gay and vice versa, and that we are just normal people then the quicker and easier it will be for people to accept it.

    The problem is most gay men let the sexuality change their personalities and lifestyle, which is like a sonicboom on the gay population as a whole. Like my cousin, he was straight, then said he was gay, instantly when he came out he went into hairdressing, yet he never had an interest in it. Other lifestyles like cabin crew, nurses - the stereotype needs to change first.

    The rainbow flag means NOTHING to no one who isn't gay - and the ones who don't support gay pride events, so how is that inpacting peoples views? It's not, only the ones who currently are accepting towards it.

    Plus a festival doesn't and can't change the views of the government, if they wanted to make it illegal to be gay again, I'm sure they would. But in the current world right now, it wouldn't happen - even with pride.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    Surely just talking about it, and making it generally accepted through talking about it (By gay people themselves first.) Would do more and have more of an inpact on peoples views and general feelings towards it instead of dressing up for one day and getting out the rainbow flags?
    Who is going to talk about it - and more importantly, who is going to listen? Gay people talking amongst themselves is not going to change anything itself. It has to be done amongst the wider society. People with prejudice against gay people (including religious leaders, the BNP, etc) would LOVE us to chatter quietly amongst ourselves and not show our faces in public. Gay Pride is about 'Hey! We're here. Deal with it!".
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    Put it this way, if I was in a club and a guy who acted camp said to me, he's straight, I'd think, really? That's how the majority works - so changing that stereotype first needs to end the public displays OF the stereotype. Then if I started talking to another guy who 'acted straight' and looked the same, then we'd think he's straight - the more people see that being camp doesn't mean you're gay and vice versa, and that we are just normal people then the quicker and easier it will be for people to accept it.
    Don't you see? YOU are the one inflaming the sterotype bonfire. As you say, being camp doesn't mean you're gay and vice versa. Take Eddie Izzard for example. He's camp. He's straight. The point is that YOU should not be bowing to this sterotype. I am not camp but I am open-minded enough to live and let live.
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    The problem is most gay men let the sexuality change their personalities and lifestyle, which is like a sonicboom on the gay population as a whole. Like my cousin, he was straight, then said he was gay, instantly when he came out he went into hairdressing, yet he never had an interest in it. Other lifestyles like cabin crew, nurses - the stereotype needs to change first.
    Most gay men???? So your cousin is the single example of what gay men are like, is he? While it is a fact that many gay people are attracted to artistic careers and may be somewhat flamboyant, MOST of us are not and do not. I work in IT. I do not have a single friend who is a hairdresser or, for that matter, one that is involved in any of the arts. The stereotype has to change in YOUR mind first.
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    The rainbow flag means NOTHING to no one who isn't gay - and the ones who don't support gay pride events, so how is that inpacting peoples views? It's not, only the ones who currently are accepting towards it.
    Hold on. Gay Pride is not a POLITICAL rally in itself but more of a celebration of political reforms gained for, and by, gay people. Straight people are often welcome to Gay Pride events but the event is not for them per se, but for gay people. So why SHOULD the gay flag mean anything to anyone other than gay people? It is just a symbol for gay people to recognise and, if neccessary, rally around.
    JavaKrypt wrote: »
    Plus a festival doesn't and can't change the views of the government, if they wanted to make it illegal to be gay again, I'm sure they would. But in the current world right now, it wouldn't happen - even with pride.
    No, but a Gay Pride event with 50 000 people turning up, ensures that the government (and the public at large) are aware that there are a lot of us out there and that we have a right to be heard and to be accepted like any other valued member of society.

    Dude, I can understand that perhaps coming to grips with your homosexuality may have put more questions in your mind than answers ... but disparaging the hard work that all these 'camp' people have done on your behalf is not going to help you. On your behalf, their successes include the statutory protection for LGB people from discrimination in the provision of goods, facilities and services; campaigns to achieve full partnership rights for same-sex couples; campaigns to achieve employment equality legislation protecting gay people from discrimination and harassment at work etc. But their work continues - Incitement to hatred (campaign to secure a new criminal offence of inciting hatred against lesbian and gay people); campaigning to secure full legal recognition for same-sex parents; campaign to tackle homophobia and homophobic bullying in schools; Workplace equality - working to ensure that gay people are treated equally in the workplace.
    'Camp' gay people make up just a proportion of our community and, unless you are the kind of person that says all Muslims must be terrorists, or all Americans must be fat, etc, then you must come to realise that everyone is different, and accept that any group within every society has its own 'sub cultures'. It's just the way it it.

    p.s. just want to add that my post looks as though I am 'attacking' you - and I don't mean it to. It's called 'heated debate'. :)
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lol
    CHURCH of England vicars are to have the phrase 'full of shit' stamped on their foreheads, it was confirmed last night.

    As vicars called for the labelling of gays, the Church agreed to a reciprocal arrangement which will see every Anglican priest branded with indelible ink.

    A Church spokesman said: "We arrived at 'full of shit' after an extensive public consultation. Other popular suggestions were 'Ever so creepy' and 'I'm hard for Jesus'."

    Secular campaigners also want the vicars to hand out a leaflet explaining why everything they believe is based on an ancient voodoo text, not a word of which is true, and that it would be perfectly understandable if you want to punch them repeatedly in the face.

    But in a quid-pro-quo, the Church is demanding tattoos for homosexuals and pre-marital fornicators, who must also have their buttocks inscribed with the date and time of each of their sinful penetrations.
    The spokesman added: "The actual 'gay' tattoo should be on the hand or forearm rather than the buttocks. If two men are down to their bare bottoms, the gayness is probably a given at that point."

    Meanwhile, social workers have called for some vicars to carry additional messages including 'not to be left alone with boys' and 'hard-drive checked by police'.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru

    Who's more foolish the fool or the fool who follows him?
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Who's more foolish the fool or the fool who follows him?
    You can't beat a good old Star Wars quote can't ya :D

    In fact, if one had to follow a religion, I'd be a Force worshipper faster than you can say 'these are not the droids you're looking for'.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Aladdin wrote: »
    You can't beat a good old Star Wars quote can't ya :D

    I knew I'd heard that quote from somewhere - I was hoping it was more Shakesperian :o
Sign In or Register to comment.