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i feel incredibly stupid...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Heya,
just in need of a rant since no one seems to be online for me to chat to.

i met someone (lets call him Bob) on a dating agency the other week, added on facebook and they found out they knew one of my friends (lets call him Fred) randomly through work..
I asked said Fred if theyd heard of Bob..they said they knew of him, and i mentioned i was to be going on a date with bob.
Anyways, i went on the date, it wasnt that great, a nice guy but just not too much in common.
Anyways, fast forward 2 weeks to tonight. Just come back from an amazing date with a guy (someone new) so all cheerful, until i get online.
Bob started asking me what i had told Fred about us, in what was quite a pissed off way. Apparently everyone knew about it and had asked him 'so hows your new gf and i heard you went on a date last week', average bloke banter. im not entirely sure why he was so annoyed, but i guess he likes his privacy which is fair enough..

Anyways, i spoke to Fred about what he'd said, asked him what was said and why. he told me he'd told his boss (still not really sure why) but obv its spread after that...Anyways, i was kinda confused and a tad cross, and was like i poss wont talk to you about dating and relationships again (obv msn making it sound 5Xs worse than in my head) but i said i wasnt having a go, just didnt get why stuff was said.
anyways, Fred kinda exploded at me, saying how he was having such a shitty time and if i was just going to have a go at him i shouldnt bother talking to him (although he said it a lot more harshly with swearing), and then logged out of msn. so now hes not talking to me..

So after a great eve, im not talking to Fred as hes not talking to me :( and im certainly not talking to Bob anymore..he said after id told him ive probs lost Fred as a friend, 'sorry for pissing on your bonfire ;)'...wtf?
Thankfully the new date is amazing and im seeing him again on the weekend, so today wasnt a total loss..just have poss lost a friend :(

Thanks for reading..not sure if im asking for advice, just needing it off my chest...

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just let Y have his fit. This whole situation probably feels 10 times worse now than it is in reality. Online fights usually are like that in my experience. ;)

    Don't big it up and give your friend time to sulk until he sees the light. You've done nothing wrong.

    Glad you've had a great date! Just enjoy that for now.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    nelly_bar wrote: »
    Heya,
    just in need of a rant since no one seems to be online for me to chat to.
    i met someone Bob on a dating agency the other week, added on facebook and they found out they knew one of my friends Harry randomly through work..
    I asked said friend Harry if theyd heard of him..they said they knew of him, and i mentioned i was to be going on a date with Bob.
    Anyways, i went on the date, it wasnt that great, a nice guy but just not too much in common.
    Anyways, fast forward 2 weeks to tonight. Just come back from an amazing date with a guy (someone new) so all cheerful, until i get online. Mr Bob started asking me what i had told Harry about us, in what was quite a pissed off way. Apparently everyone knew about it and had asked him 'so hows your new gf and i heard you went on a date last week', average bloke banter. im not entirely sure why he was so annoyed, but i guess he likes his privacy which is fair enough..
    Anyways, i spoke to Harry about what he'd said, asked him what was said and why. he told me he'd told his boss (still not really sure why) but obv its spread after that...Anyways, i was kinda confused and a tad cross, and was like i poss wont talk to you about dating and relationships again (obv msn making it sound 5Bobs worse than in my head) but i said i wasnt having a go, just didnt get why stuff was said.
    anyways, Harry kinda exploded at me, saying how he was having such a shitty time and if i was just going to have a go at him i shouldnt bother talking to him (although he said it a lot more harshly with swearing), and then logged out of msn. so now hes not talking to me..
    So after a great eve, im not talking to Harry as hes not talking to me and im certainly not talking to Bob anymore..he said after id told him ive probs lost Harry as a friend, 'sorry for pissing on your bonfire '...wtf?
    Thankfully the new date is amazing and im seeing him again on the weekend, so today wasnt a total loss..just have poss lost a friend
    Thanks for reading..not sure if im asking for advice, just needing it off my chest...

    Psuedonym names are far easier to follow then X and Y. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jaloux wrote: »
    Just let Y have his fit. This whole situation probably feels 10 times worse now than it is in reality. Online fights usually are like that in my experience. ;)

    Don't big it up and give your friend time to sulk until he sees the light. You've done nothing wrong.

    Glad you've had a great date! Just enjoy that for now.

    Thankyou, ill just leave it fade out and see if he starts talking to me eventually again.

    And the date was amazing, i cant wait for the weekend:)

    Teagan - yeah, ill change that in bit. I was half asleep and X and Y were the only things i could think of at 2am, hehe!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Xerxes and Yuri ? :D

    To be honest been in situations where I've had these online spats before and they usually blow over. Well done on the good date :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i dont know..i told him weeks ago that i used to fancy him..lol!
    but hes engaged atm..not that he's too happy bout it all atm.

    but i dont know, i dont understand why he got so narked..
    hes even changed his facebook status to 'people should get their facts right before they open their mouths!!!!!!'
    i mean, that what i was trying to do!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    dont worry,its not your fault
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    update: still not heard from Fred, so he's being reeeeally grown up about it all as you can see.... Well its his loss if he cant grow up and just be a decent friend...
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