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attention deficit disorder
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
Does anyone here have it?
Beep boop. I'm a bot.
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The reason I ask is because it seems my eldest son seems to tick most of the boxes for it (as well as dyspraxia) He hasnt actually been diagnosed with anything yet though.
The more i read about it, the more I think I have it too, although without the hyperactivity part. Its felt like a bit of a revelation tbh
What I found made the biggest different was making sure you had the childs complete attention (and eye contact) before you gave them instructions, and keeping that eye contact for the length of any instructions. Generally it seems to work best to give relatively short instructions with the last one being come back when you're done for the next one.
That and depending on age, writing it down in lists.
The former being the latter without the hyperactivity.
Edit: I can't really read magazine articles either without getting distracted half way through, same sort of problem as with films
I cant concentrate on more than one thing at a time very easily and get quite overwhelmed if i have to
I had a read up on it as I realised I probably didn't know the facts from the myths on this one, it was very interesting, I realise that it's one of those conditions that gets thrown about a bit in the media in an inaccurate way so it's good to know a bit more about it. I don't have personal experience of this one (although when I saw the list of symptons I do suffer from about 7 out of the 9 but in my case they are all explained by other causes e.g. depression, personality disorder etc and they didn't start at such an early age as with adhd).
It might be worth talking to a professional about it, if he is already diagnosed dyspraxia you must already have had some contact with a child pyschologist or a similar professional I assume? Maybe you could talk to them about it? Or if that is not an option then maybe there is someone else you could speak to. What I read seemed to suggest that the symptons experienced could be due to several causes and there can be the same symptons due to a variety of different conditions so it would be good to get the problems your son experiences looked into to check what is causing them, be it adhd or another condition.
I think with a lot of issues and conditions that learning more about them can be really really helpful, so you can see how best to help him and also so it seems less bizarre or scary or annoying or distressing or however else you experience his symptons. I know that learning about my own health issues has been one of the most helpful things that I can do for myself.
I'm not sure of links between dyspraxia and adhd but I thought that as you'd mentioned it then I would also just mention that I have experienced working with children with ths condition. I used to work as a private tutor and had some students with dyspraxia, again I found that learning a bit a more about it helped me to help them better although as they were older (the students I had with this condition were of secondary school age) they already knew what helped them best and what worked for them and although there were specific things I could do to help them it did vary between pupils with the same condition as to what helped or hindered them. E.g one of them found bright colours useful whereas another found anything other than black-and-white to be not good. So I guess the best thing to do is to learn as much as possible about the various things that could help and then try them out to see which work best for your son.
Hmm, not sure what else so say. I just wanted to offer you some hugs really and say that I hope you are both okay, I don't have anything particularly useful to add to the discussion but I hope someone can provide what you are looking for on here or point you in the right direction
Its hard with Lenny, getting a diagnosis seems to be incredibly difficult. The dyspraxia thing has been up in the air since he was about 4 and at nursery. I assumed that if thats what it was, then a diagnosis would just kind of happen. It doesnt. Im having to push so hard for it and have been passed from pillar to post. He hasnt seen an educational psychologist. Ive asked for him to be referred to one. Ive been told he may not even get an appointment this year, maybe not even next year. I am in quite close contact with the schools SENCO who is fab, but shes held back by a lot of red tape. She said that if we couldnt see an EP, then maybe we could look at other options such as statementing. She then said he may be doing slightly too well to be statemented and that we need to look for other options!! Im not sure what other options there are, or how to go about it, but the school doctor, his teacher and the SENCO and his headmaster are all on my side here, but the system doesnt seem to be set up to help children get what they need very easily or quickly. To get what Lenny needs now, at his level - his level would have to be so much worse - like theyre commited to only and always giving less than is needed.
He is incredibly hard work, id say he was just as demanding as the babies (in his own way) With the way that MY brain works, i just find the whole thing quite overwhelming a lot of the time, especially now its the summer holidays. I get through the days on autopilot
In terms of yourself, have you considered seeing your doctor about your own issues? As they could also be due to other things like depression for example. I know that the more depressed I get the less able I am to concentrate, I can't read novels, I have a terrible momory, get distracted very easily, can't organise myself to get even quite basic things done and that sort of thing.
I understand that the idea of medicating your son is distressing for you but I'm sure that is just one of many options for him. I really hope that he gets the help that he needs soon
It depends on your GP and the relationship you have with them but sometimes mine is just really supportive and I feel better for just having talked things through with her.
I'm sure as well that there are maybe physical things that would cause the same symptons like not getting enough iron or something (actually I don't think not enough iron causes that set of symptons but you get what I mean I hope, like that there could be something quite 'simple' that causes it)
Whatever the diagonosis then there are options that aren't medication if you aren't keen on that idea.
I know what you mean about having to make excuses all the time, I feel really embarassed by the way - I am so forgetful, unfocussed etc at the moment. I get so distracted and I'm often late because even the basic task of getting myself up and dressed and brushing my teeth etc seems a very complicated task to focus on. Depending on who it is that I'm letting down it often helps (if possible) to explain a bit about why I am being useless, not so much as making an excuse as just being open can really help, good friends seem to understand when I explain that it's my health problems that make me the way I am. Obviously it depends on who and what and why as to how appropriate this is but more and more I'm finding it a good one.
The experience I have had is that caffeine and additives do ADD/ADHD sufferers no good at all, and cutting them out and sticking to a healthy low sugar low caffeine low additives diet can make a surprising difference.
It's fab to hear that you have the support from the school. I know that diagnoses are hard to get (worked a lot with children with SEN, and hope to be a SENCO), perhaps meet with the SENCO again to discuss other options. I totally agree, the system makes it so hard and frustrating for parents, children and the teaching staff.
Don't know if you've seen it, but the Dyspraxia Foundation's website is brill. http://www.dyspraxiafoundation.org.uk/info/local.php
That link gives info of a local support group, just thinking that more support may be useful.
http://www.dyspraxiafoundation.org.uk/services/gu_daily.php
You mentioned how difficult it can be, and I really don't want you to think that I'm being rude, or undermiming you, but that link has loads of brilliant tips for making things a little bit easier.
I really hope that I've helped a little, and not just waffled!
http://www.dyspraxiafoundation.org.uk/downloads/show_download.php?id=9
Don't know if it'll be of any help though!
There might be alternative forms of therapy/help that may help? My mum was offered medciation for my brother (he has autism) but he refused to take it and now he seems ok.
I get this as well, but it's possibly linked to Nystagmus/the way my eyes work.
How awful.:( There was something about that in the paper a while back - loads of children were sent by a psychologist because the teacher thought they had something wrong, but it turns out some of them are just that way and have nothing wrong with them.
So much time wasted. I am so afraid for his future.
As for alternative therapies, I wish i knew!
I have started him on high dose omega 3 supplements as that is reputed to be beneficial for ADHD. We shall see.
The idea of medication is scary as i really dont want to stifle his personality. Hes a lovely boy, it would break my heart. Its so hard to know what to do for the best.
Ive seen his various teachers, SENCO, Headmaster, My GP, Health visitor, school doctor, speech and language therapist and occupational therapist (hes hypermobile too).
Im really really hoping he can see the educational psychologist this year.
Your-babe, thanks for those links. Its a great website, i have used it before but appreciate the help anyway
I'll ask a friend who is an EP what would be the best way for you to progress things. In the meantime, if it were me I would go and pester your GP (and keep pesterting) until he makes at least some enquiries to start to sort it out for you..
Personally I think it is a difficult issue as most boys I know (I have two myself) are all on a sliding scale with the extreme cases like yours obviously being toward the top end of the spectrum. Whether or not it is a case that they are 'ill' or require treatment is of course open to debate.
Similarly, the rise in the various forms of 'autism' isn't really a increased incidence of it..it is purely as a result of a change in the diagnosis of the symptoms that present and the rebranding of other descriptions that were used in previous generations (challenging/retarded/etc etc etc).
One friends child who was 'very' challenging between the ages of 4 and about 8/9 is now a very clever and confident 12 year old who got into a selective school purely on ability.
Best wishes
Hes not especially willful or defiant, in fact he didnt fit what my previous stereotype of an ADHD kid was at all because he can concentrate when HE wants to, for instance if hes drawing or watching a dvd he likes but anything else he just cant. Id like to say it was more of a case of he wont, rather than cant, but it doesnt seem to be the case. It just doesnt seem to get any better. Hes just totally impulsive.
Pestering my GP wouldnt make any difference, as its the education authorities it needs to go through, not the health authorities. My GP is fantastic. If it was down to her it would be sorted already
My mum is thought to have it, and it's also possible I have ADD Inattentive (without hyperactivity) but my mum was refused the funds for a referral to maudsley recently, but we're not giving up, it's worth it just for a diagnosis.