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Depressive do you know what that is?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
My long term boyfriend has depressive he told me all about it, but he does get evry emotional mad and angrey quickly. I love him very much and I can deal with his anger even if it does hurt me alot but he can't help it and he always says sorry after hes calmed down. Things at the moment are great I wouldn't change him for the world. But the issue of sex is coming up we have been together for 3months or so and already sex is in the air, we are both virgins and he asked me if we should when we have time alone and I want it to be perfection even though I won't get it that, I just fear it first time and all just want to make sure I am 100% ready and I don't want to be pressured and it seems he does and as hes at uni I don't see him as much and I went to see him last weekend not the one just gone well anyway and about an hour before I had to go and get the bus home he asked me he was like wanting to do it and I said no not now and he got mad and didn't talk to me all the way to town and when I got on the bus he hardly spoke a word he looked so mad I was anoyed to so I didnt say much only whats wrong and he just looked. and I was so upset I wanted to cry there and then and I walked on the bus kissed him on the cheek and said I do love you you know about to cry and I got on the bus and I cried he saw he looked sad for a few days I was mad and I didn't speak to him really he just got mad but it is sorted now but I don't want that happening everytime and he says its his depressive he can't help it but I do love him dearly just sometimes it hurts suppose I shouldn't moan really but how do you cope in a situation where your other half has this depressive I read up on it online I would say go and look type in that world on a search engine then you may understand thanks for reading sorry to bore you

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Jodie. Your b/f has depression. Just be there for him, that's all you can do but depression is not an excuse for treating your partner badly repeatedly.

    Don't rush into anything too quickly if you are not ready, you have plenty of time.

    Just a friendly tip, when/if you post again, please use sentences, I found that really hard to read. More people will reply if what you write is easier to understand!

    Take care.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thanks sorry.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    don't appologise for posting, it wasn't boring... just hard to read.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi. ive been clinically depressed for 4 years. Your boyfriend is not just feeling "blue", as another poster has said.

    Your boyfriend is standing at the edge of a precipice, and cant pull himself back. everything around him is crumbling, everything he looks at has a hazy glare of dispondancy, and nothing anyone says will help him.

    unfortunatly there is little YOUcan do to help him either. just be there for him.

    He'll be very unhappy and very upset for along time. if you feel you can deal with that, then ur a good person.

    It mite take him a year to recover.Mite take 3 years, or he might NEVER be what he used to be. this is the nature of the beast.

    He miht say things to you he doesnt mean, but be too proud to admit it.

    If you love him, dont give up on him.

    he probably needs you.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks alot for your help but my boyfriend isn't always very depressed only gets episodes of mad moods and becomes very emotional depression is different from depressive.
    Depression can go away but depressive will always be there mentally in his head, it is the same really he tried explaining it to me but go to a search engine type depressive in and read about it, thank you so much for your help

    :) Take care xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ive been depressed for longer than i can remember-- if he's on drugs to treat it, that can make it worse at time which could account for the irregularities??? They basically make u feel better for most of the time, but can let you retract into a seriously negative state at others-- am afraid the only thing that works is being there for him and not taking every negative thing he may say to be directed at you, just that he's havin a rough time
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