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My best friend and his ex pregnant gf
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
It's a bit of a long story which i may give more background about when i'm in work but it goes like this...
My best mate is 21 nearly 22 and has been with his gf about 2 years, she is 18 now, they live in the same road. She and her family are very messed up, i've made posts about it in the past but all my posts are deleted now so i can't get it for you.
Her mum is an alcoholic, her father defrauds benefits, her older sister is beaten reguarly by her boyfriend but they still let him in the house and make the girl feel like it's her fault. Her younger sister has been taken into care for self harming, taking cocaine and being generaly violent, she used to carve hate words into her door with a knife. His girlfriend herself just shows signs of being equally as messed up, she does really silly stupid thigns and does thigns to control him to get what she wants, very immature etc etc but that's his ownf ault for getting involved with someone like this. She does things really stupid like asking to lend money or her mum and coming back with cigarettes while pregnant and smoking them saying "you wouldn't buy me them" when the money was meant for her mother. She drinks while pregnant too. End of the day there's just so many messed up stuff it would by pages long to explain.
Now the problem is her parents ahve been messing with her head and have told her not to put Ray, the father on the birth certificate so they get more benefits at the same time as convincing her not to move house even though she nearly split up with ray over getting a council house together. Her alcoholic mother has told Ray when the baby is born he's not allowed to come round to the house to sleep over anymore, he's not sitting in their house all day with the baby and he's not taking it round toh is house all the time.
She had a kidney infection during pregnancy and was taken to hospital, she got antibiotics and she muast not ahve been tkaing them because she was in hospital again a few weeks later with the same problem. they've split up because he wants hisame on the birth cert and has said he doesnt care about benefits he wants his name on it, so she split up with him. While in hospital, 2-3 days ago he gets a call and they say she's in hospital everything is ok, the doctors said no one is allowed to visit. He rang the hospital but they could not tell him anything. He tried tog et tot he hospital anyway but couldn'tr get there he had no moeny or anyone tot ake him. The next day he gets a call and they say she's fine, they've broken her water but it's nothign tow orry about and jenny has decided(yeah right) that she doesn't want to see him. Next her gets another call and they say she's had the baby now, it's ok but he's still not allowed to see it. He rang me at 1am last night crying with anger, it was his first born child and she's taking it away from him.
I'm wondering if anyone knows what he can do, she has a psychotic family and he doesn't want ti raised in that house, he wants custody of the children but she's not even going to name him on the birth certificate, what can he do?
He doesn't have much money, i said i'll support him and try to help him any way i can but it's absolutely heart breaking and a disgrace. i don't even think it's so much about benefits, she and her family jusgt want control over the child and to her(Alisha) away from him. They're that type of family.
I don't want a debate on fathers rights here even though i debated it in the past. I've advised him to get his mother behind him to fight his corner, forget all arguements and his gf, he should forget aobut any couple relationship with her and concentrate on being in the childs life so when they try to argue just ignore it. If he lets up and doesn't get his foot in the door now he will be unable to hold a grip on the child. It's as if his ex gfs mother and father are holding more authority than him and they are filling his ex gf jenny with a lot of selfish shit and she's so gullibale, immature and immoral that she follows it.
Ray is a really good lad, been with him through thick and thin and i know he would raise good children, he's surrounded by them in his own family and takes care of them constantly.
My best mate is 21 nearly 22 and has been with his gf about 2 years, she is 18 now, they live in the same road. She and her family are very messed up, i've made posts about it in the past but all my posts are deleted now so i can't get it for you.
Her mum is an alcoholic, her father defrauds benefits, her older sister is beaten reguarly by her boyfriend but they still let him in the house and make the girl feel like it's her fault. Her younger sister has been taken into care for self harming, taking cocaine and being generaly violent, she used to carve hate words into her door with a knife. His girlfriend herself just shows signs of being equally as messed up, she does really silly stupid thigns and does thigns to control him to get what she wants, very immature etc etc but that's his ownf ault for getting involved with someone like this. She does things really stupid like asking to lend money or her mum and coming back with cigarettes while pregnant and smoking them saying "you wouldn't buy me them" when the money was meant for her mother. She drinks while pregnant too. End of the day there's just so many messed up stuff it would by pages long to explain.
Now the problem is her parents ahve been messing with her head and have told her not to put Ray, the father on the birth certificate so they get more benefits at the same time as convincing her not to move house even though she nearly split up with ray over getting a council house together. Her alcoholic mother has told Ray when the baby is born he's not allowed to come round to the house to sleep over anymore, he's not sitting in their house all day with the baby and he's not taking it round toh is house all the time.
She had a kidney infection during pregnancy and was taken to hospital, she got antibiotics and she muast not ahve been tkaing them because she was in hospital again a few weeks later with the same problem. they've split up because he wants hisame on the birth cert and has said he doesnt care about benefits he wants his name on it, so she split up with him. While in hospital, 2-3 days ago he gets a call and they say she's in hospital everything is ok, the doctors said no one is allowed to visit. He rang the hospital but they could not tell him anything. He tried tog et tot he hospital anyway but couldn'tr get there he had no moeny or anyone tot ake him. The next day he gets a call and they say she's fine, they've broken her water but it's nothign tow orry about and jenny has decided(yeah right) that she doesn't want to see him. Next her gets another call and they say she's had the baby now, it's ok but he's still not allowed to see it. He rang me at 1am last night crying with anger, it was his first born child and she's taking it away from him.
I'm wondering if anyone knows what he can do, she has a psychotic family and he doesn't want ti raised in that house, he wants custody of the children but she's not even going to name him on the birth certificate, what can he do?
He doesn't have much money, i said i'll support him and try to help him any way i can but it's absolutely heart breaking and a disgrace. i don't even think it's so much about benefits, she and her family jusgt want control over the child and to her(Alisha) away from him. They're that type of family.
I don't want a debate on fathers rights here even though i debated it in the past. I've advised him to get his mother behind him to fight his corner, forget all arguements and his gf, he should forget aobut any couple relationship with her and concentrate on being in the childs life so when they try to argue just ignore it. If he lets up and doesn't get his foot in the door now he will be unable to hold a grip on the child. It's as if his ex gfs mother and father are holding more authority than him and they are filling his ex gf jenny with a lot of selfish shit and she's so gullibale, immature and immoral that she follows it.
Ray is a really good lad, been with him through thick and thin and i know he would raise good children, he's surrounded by them in his own family and takes care of them constantly.
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