Bit of a petty one...

Former Member

.

Former Member

Oh I know how you feel. One of my friends forgot about my 17th and never even apologised, she just sat there and didn't say anything when she realised. I wasn't going to get her anything but the party was at her house with her parents so it wouldn't look good if i didn't get her anything. I only spent a fiver on her though.

Former Member

there are three options that i can see:

1) buy her something amazingly thoughtful that means something special to her and make her feel guilty and shitty

2) buy her nothing because she bought you nothing so why should you?

3) buy her something nice, but not over the top, showing that you are a lovely friend who actually remembers her friends' birthdays, she'll probably feel bad enough without you going all-out to get your own back.

depends how much you like her really

Former Member

Or buy her something really naff.

Former Member

I can't believe you're upset because someone you're supposed to like didn't buy you something. If you want to and think she'd appreciate it then, buy her a card, if you don't want to then don't. If you'd like to really but are not buying a card out of spite or revenge then you're cutting off your nose to spite your face tbh.

Former Member

katralla wrote: »

I can't believe you're upset because someone you're supposed to like didn't buy you something.

I didnt say I was 'upset'. Its more etiquete (sp) I'm asking about.

Former Member

i wouldnt expect anything off any of my friends an they can be fucked if they think theyre gettin anythin off me bar a few pints or a few e's!

Skive

z- wrote: »

i wouldnt expect anything off any of my friends an they can be fucked if they think theyre gettin anythin off me bar a few pints or a few e's!

:yes:

No cards, no presents, just the promise to get right on it.

Former Member

Did she know it was your birthday? Does she usually give you or anybody stuff for their birthday? I'm a bit with Z. I've never given or been given stuff for friends birthdays but a few drinks at the bar or something like that. If you do usually give stuff for your friends birthdays, just give something similar. No point in making a bit deal about, especially if it didn't upset you.

Former Member

kate- wrote: »

I didnt say I was 'upset'. Its more etiquete (sp) I'm asking about.

Fair enough, I wouldn't bother with a card, I never do anyway though.

Former Member

I don't know if its just me but I'd be quite upset if my best friend didn't even get me a card for my birthday? I mean fair enough if she was really skint or someething. I guess it depends on what type of friendship you have, i wouldnt dream of not getting my best friend a card or present for her birthday. I know its not all about material things but its something nice to do in a friendship.

i think i would get her a card and a small present. :]

Former Member

i dont tend to get my friends cards or presents either.

Former Member

Same thing kinda happened to me but me and my best friends always seem to be skint any way so for my 18th I just had my drinks bought all night and on one of my best mates 18th we all did the same.

Get her a drink and maybe a card but I wouldn't spend a lot on her if she can't afford/ be bothered to do the same for you.

Former Member

I'd be annoyed!

There's no excuse for not getting ya best mate at least a card

(ok boys are different....but we aint talkin about boys here...)

And if i couldnt afford to get a present, i'd at least explain

But by the sounds of it, she didnt even know it was ya birthday, which in my opinion is even worse!

Just get her a card n a cheap bottle of plonk

Former Member

Depends how bothered you were by her not getting you anything, and how bothered she will be by you doing the same. You could take the moral high ground as it were and get her something really nice, which might make her feel pretty guilty. Or just get her a card. And if anyone has the cheek to comment on it, just say you didn't think the two of you did presents.

Former Member

It would piss me off slightly. I don't expect a massive, expensive present just a little something is good enough. I think it shows how good a friend they are!

If it was me I would buy her a pretty decent present and a really nice card...but then again I am petty

Former Member

If someone didnt buy me something for my borthday, i wouldnt buy anything back tbh, fairs fair!

Former Member

Just to add she totally knew it was my birthday! We discussed where we were gonna go for it for weeks...

Former Member

Do you normally get each other presents/cards?

Former Member

I'd be fucking upset. But there's no way in hell me and my bestie would ever forget something like that.

I'd go for omghi's option #3

Former Member

.

Former Member

maybe she is skint right now and doesn't want to talk about it.

as long as she actually said 'happy birthday' then i wouldn't worry too much over it

Former Member

There's no way my best friend would forget my birthday or me her's, we remind eachother to much

Just get her a card or something or if you don't want to, don't.

If she asks why you didn't get her anything, explain how upset you were when you didn't get anything off her!

If she is skint fair dues but all she had to do was say!

Former Member

If you were going to get her a card or something anyway, do it, otherwise you're just being passive-aggressive which is probably something you don't want reflected on you.

Former Member

Don't get her anything.

If she raises the issue, don't say "Well, you didn't get me anything!" but, rather, "Oh, I presumed you did not think it was important".

Get out of the habit of buying presents and cards etc and it will save you money in the future AND take the headache of trying to find something suitable.

Having said that, me and my close friends (male and female) usually always exchange at least a card. But I'm a lady boy. We do those sorts of things ... while the men are off huntin' and gatherin' etc

Former Member

Just get her a card, a cheap one

Former Member

I used to get kinda pissed off when my friends didn't give me anything, but then when they finally started giving me stuff I got even more pissed off at the rubbish they gave me.

I can understand why you'd be frustrated but I think cases like those are when you decide what you think is more important, doing things eye for an eye or just behaving like you think is ideal and do something for her.

I don't get this whole giving cards thing (personally I'd rather not get anything than a card ) but it seems a fairly neutral way of acknowleding it's her birthday without doing anything special on the occasion.

In the grand scheme of things, I don't think birthday gifts are any true representation of the strength of a friendship.

Former Member

I wouldn't give a crap either way, to be honest. I prefer people NOT to get me anything. If they must, some booze/drugs will do nicely.

Cards - waste of time and money, never mind the environment! Sod that.

Just forget about it - in the grand scheme of things, it really doesn't matter in the slightest. Bottom line. :yeees: If you're friends, just the continuing friendship is more than enough.



Well, to blokes, anyway. :rolleyes: Imagine if you were guys just how much time, money and worrying you could save by just not bothering with daft presents.

Former Member

SuzyCreamcheese wrote: »

i dont tend to get my friends cards or presents either.

Me neither and they never get me anything. (because I'm so hard to buy for I think!)

I wouldn't give a crap either way, to be honest. I prefer people NOT to get me anything. If they must, some booze/drugs will do nicely.

Cards - waste of time and money, never mind the environment! Sod that.

:yes: