Gay unrequited, long distance and confused..

Former Member

I'll keep this brief as i can. Im a guy and i met a guy i liked last march online. He invited me down last july and we had two consequetive nights of sex. I asked during the week if i could come again, and he said yes. but he didn't want to do what we had done again. I went down but when nothing happened and he kept me up when i was trying to sleep and i cracked and told him "i really liked him". he told me he didn't feel the same way and i was majorly hurt by this, next morning didn't speak much so decided i just had to drive all the way home :O Didn't speak for a month or two on and off after..

Anyway the confusion is how he relates to me, we talk late at night and even speak on the phone early hours. stated speaking again this new year and he was going on about this guy he likes and who just asked him out. So he has got a relationshop going, but confuses me by saying i should come move down and he can move in with me. Anyway we've talked, and he said "it might not be a good idea", just this last week of getting a hotel togther to meet up again, but to my suprise he actually brought it up after me mentioing he'd been looking at hotels and he wants to do it.. providing i pay becuase he dont have any money :O

Can you see the confusion i have? Someone please help...

xxx

Former Member

He's using you. It's pretty obvious, he sounds like a twat.

Former Member

How is he using me? im confused. Do you think he likes me?

Former Member

Sounds like he likes you for a quick shag and some conversation every now and again, but prefers to be able to dispose of you when it suits. If that's the sort of casual relationship that you want then carry on. If you want something more serious it doesn't sound like it'll happen. The guy has a boyfriend after all.

Former Member

goddog2 wrote: »

How is he using me? im confused. Do you think he likes me?

It doesn't matter if he likes you - he's using you, playing on the fact that you obviously like him a lot.

Former Member

Yeh ok, i know he has a boyfriend but he has had soo many i dont really see him as a threat. Think he's using me to make his b/f jealous? im confused. I would love sex again with him. Do you think he wants it to happen by having a hotel room with me? im confused..

Im probably going to go ahead with it anyway, and hope for the best. Even if it is just some casual fun. For now this is what have to look forward to i guess, no one else interests me.. lol

Thanks for all you advice

Former Member

They say love is blind eh? :razz:

Former Member

Don't you want someone who wants you only and who likes you truely? You're a special person in your own right and that alone deserves a partner who is dedicated to you only. Allowing yourself to be 2nd best is soul destroying.
That's before we've hit on the trust issues that are inevitable should you and this guy start a relationship or the total lack of respect, dignity and humanity you have for his partner.

Former Member

Well if i go through with it, i can see what happens and learn abit more about why we still speak etc. I guess what im wanting is for someone to tell me he wants sex in the hotel. lol But no one can answer that other than him... and if i asked him he'd defo say no... i just dont think he thinks "no", rather i think he will do what "he wants" and keep his options open.

But i am keeping myself on the map, all this mess eh? i only met him for like 4/5 days in total in knowing him almost a year. But big things could come from this second meet. It could go tits up or i could have more fun... hopefully