What should I do?

Former Member

Help...

I have been chatting online with a man who works in the same office as me. We have never discussed our relationship at work.

I know he lives with someone but is now looking for a place of his own but is having trouble getting a mortgage for a place in the area. I do believe him and it is openly discussed at work about his future batchelor pad.

I am getting impatient now. How long do I go on believing he wants to move out and is not just making the right noises?

Until now we have avoided being alone but I am wondering if it would hurt to move things on and see how things would be between us.

All thoughts welcome

Pearly

Hiya,

In my experience it can take a long time to get a mortgage sorted out - sometimes months, even more if you've not got the right credit history and so on, so I wouldn't say that's unusual in taking time.

You say you've avoided being alone together, but maybe you both need to spend some more time with each other in order to feel more secure about how he feels about you and you can put these questions to him? It does sound promising that he plans to move out though if it's being discussed at work, if it was a secret I'd be more worried... Either way it sounds like early days and perhaps he just wants to get used to living on his own for a bit? I'm not sure if the person you refer to that he's living with is an ex-partner?

Hope things sort out for you
Pearly