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Is it shallow...
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
...for a girl to refuse to go out with a guy smaller than her?
The reason why I ask is because I got called shallow the other day for saying I wouldn't date a guy shorter than me. My reasons? One, I'm just not attracted to small men. I like a guy who looks like he can look after me and two, I'd look stupid with a smaller guy!
I got called shallow but yet the person who said that to me said he wouldn't date an overweight girl! :rolleyes:
Just wanted people's opinions on it really as I've been made to feel as though I'm a shallow person!
The reason why I ask is because I got called shallow the other day for saying I wouldn't date a guy shorter than me. My reasons? One, I'm just not attracted to small men. I like a guy who looks like he can look after me and two, I'd look stupid with a smaller guy!
I got called shallow but yet the person who said that to me said he wouldn't date an overweight girl! :rolleyes:
Just wanted people's opinions on it really as I've been made to feel as though I'm a shallow person!
Beep boop. I'm a bot.
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The first reason, no that's not shallow. The second reason is presumably linked to the first. The third reason, yes that is shallow.
EDIT: Plus I agree with IWS.
Why though? It wouldn't be the guy making me look stupid, it would be MY height making me look stupid.
Do you not consider it shallow to base a relationship on how you look together?
However, I wouldn't be happy in a relationship if I felt really unattractive being tall.
Hmm, well I reckon I might feel a bit uncomfortable at first going out with a taller girl, or going out with an asian girl in a majority asian area for example. But equally, I'd accept that it's a bit of a shallow reason not to go out with someone. After a while, I'd also probably realise that anyone who did have an issue with it would be the shallow ones, not us.
That reminded me of that Sugababes song!
I don't base my friendships on looks. I'm talking about guys I'm attracted to.
It's a good saying. My boyfriend is only just taller than me (he's 5ft 5) so is considered 'short' for a guy. It doesn't bother me though. I feel secure enough with him - and he's very strong (he has yummy arm and shoulder muscles) and can pick me up/carry me just as any 'taller' guy - so it doesn't really register that he's short. But as you're slightly tall i think, I can understand why you'd feel funny with a shorter guy. I would if i was tall.
At the moment though all you are saying is that you prefer tall guys in general surely.
So I guess initially I wouldn't go for a shorter bloke but if I got to know him and liked his personality then I'd definately go for it! But overall I do feel more comfortable with a taller bloke, so not shallow just preference I reckon.
When there's photos of people with their boy/girlfriends together, for example at balls or parties, friends will comment "Aww you look so sweet together", "You look a perfect match", "You two are such a cute couple" etc, is that 'shallow'???
Ditto. I personally don't think it's shallow to say that.
If you're dating and you don't find someone attractive then the relationship isn't going to go anywhere. Fact of life. But if you are being ridiculously picky, and you're not giving people any chance, then you probably are being picky. If you think a guy's great but he's an inch too short, so you chuck him, then you are being shallow, but if you don't click with someone AND he's too short then you're not.
How?
Yeah, but you have some warped perceptions on things really.
On topic, I think it could be a little shallow if thats the only reason. Personally, I prefer dark haired guys, because of how I look its a bit weird if I go out with really blonde people (as opposed to blondey/brown haired people). Doesn't mean I discount them completely though.
because in GOOD relationships, its about how you get on as a couple. Whether you make good companions for each other. Whether you click. Whether you make each other laugh, whether youre truly right for each other.
If you dismiss someone who is fabulous for you, because of one minor detail then youre being silly, unless of course all you want is a fuck and someone you think phwooarr when you see them. In ADULT relationships its about so much more than that. You really can never know what the man/woman of your dreams will look like until youve actually met them.
You'll learn what it's all about, one day.
Well there you go, you can't help who you are attracted to. I could never be with someone I considered skinny. I tried it with a guy who was great in every way and I got on really well with. I really did try and 'get over it' but I just couldn't!
No, as they comments are very rarely about individual appearances and about how the couple look together. That they look happy together, that they look completely at ease with one another, that they're fucking delighted that their significant other actually exists.
It has fuck all to do with the attractiveness of the couple and everything to do with how they interact.
However, it isn't shallow. As a bloke, I'd be uneasy going out with a woman who was taller than me. That means anyone over 5ft 11in is out. It's just a male pride thing for us, and for a woman to want to be "protected" is perfectly natural and understandable.