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Spiralling out of control

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Health & Wellbeing
I don't know whats wrong with me. I feel down every day, I don't want to interact with anyone and I spend my days in the corner of the school library, I have great friends who I love to pieces but social interaction just doesn't interest me anymore to such a degree that I am dreading spending time with people and have to constantly force a smile on my face - I just can't seem to cheer myself up. I am constantly exhausted and I feel drained both physically and mentally yet when I try to go to sleep nothing happens, hence why I am writing this at 1am. I find myself getting very angry or tearful at the smallest things and I find myself in fits of hysteria most days when I get home from school. I just feel like there is no point o my existence anymore and I hate myself for it.
Does anyone know whats wrong with me? I feel like I am complaining which is why I don't feel that I can say any of this to friends or family. Is this something I need to go to a doctor for. Please someone help me I feel like I am losing all control over my life and I don't know how to fix it.

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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Its definetly something to go see your doctor about it, especally if its affecting your day to day life, so they could see if theres a reason so they can give a diagnosis and maybe treatment to help. Im sure you know - but we cant say whats wrong and only doctors can give diagnosis. I feel this way and i have depression and emtionally unstable personality disorder. And for some just knowing whats wrong can help.
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,615 Legendary Poster
    Hey there, welcome to the boards.

    As Shaunie said, it's definitely something worth seeing a doctor about. They will probably be able to tell you what's wrong (if anything) and recommend some sort of support for you.

    I just wanted to point out as well, that you've done amazingly to post on here. It can be really hard to open up and you've been very brave in doing so!

    Take care,

    - Eleanor :)
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
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    SunshineSoulSunshineSoul Posts: 57 Boards Initiate
    Hi Lily,

    Thanks for sharing on the boards, you never need to feel like you’re complaining we’re all here to help and listen to your concerns. It sounds as if you’ve been going through a tough time recently but do not fear, these feelings will soon pass - like a rain cloud does to reveal the sunshine, even if it takes some work in figuring out why you may be feeling this way. Have you experienced these feelings before? As @Shaunie mentioned only a doctor will be able to diagnose, and it sounds as if you would benefit from speaking to a doctor and seeing what they can do for you.

    In the meantime, when you get back from school is there something you enjoy doing which can help to put your mind at ease, perhaps listening to your favourite music, taking a walk, colouring or watching your favourite shows? It’s okay to not feel ‘okay’ and I know sometimes we can stress over not feeling 100% ourselves but just try not to focus on the ‘why’ and just allow yourself to feel – I think when we try to analyse our feelings too much it can be too difficult for our minds and we end up getting even more worked up! So try to relax as much as possible – have a cuppa, get cosy on the sofa and try out the methods I suggested above.

    When I am feeling this way what works for me is to listen to a chill mix, earphones in, my mind, body and soul taken away with the music and take a long walk in the great outdoors, is there anywhere near you where you could go to clear your head? Can you think of any methods you could try or what may have worked for you in the past?

    If you are struggling again then remember we’re always here on The Mix to offer support.

    Take Care,

    - Sunny :rainbow:
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